I want to talk about Climate Change. Why? Because it’s a hot button topic currently and it needs to be discussed, and backed up with action. You may have noticed that I have used upper case letters for Climate Change; the reason is, at least to me, the situation is that severe, it deserves capital letters.

Before I go any further, we need to clear up two things about this blog post. Firstly, I try in vain to make my blog posts funny and entertaining, which is more difficult than I thought it would ever be. Talking about comics, being a parent, the DMZ, are lots of fun to me. However, I find nothing funny about the concept of Climate Change.

Secondly, I have to assume something about you.¹ If you’re reading this blog, I have to assume you must accept two things: 1.) Climate Change is real, and 2.) Climate Change is caused by human activity and it’s increasing. Also let’s make sure we all agree what Climate Change actually is.

The way I understand Climate Change, are the overall global weather patterns, caused by an increased build up of greenhouses gases like carbon dioxide (CO₂) and others, like methane. This is done through burning fossil fuels like coal, petrol and oil; deforestation; agricultural techniques and livestock farming; among other things.

What this means, is that the Earth is slowly becoming warmer. Because global weather patterns are connected, and if the average global temperature continues to rise, the regions that are hot, will get hotter; the regions that are cold; will get colder. Basically, global weather patterns will take steroids, and dial worldwide disasters up to 11.

Sweet, we’re on the same page, now.

So…. can you stop Climate Change by yourself? No, no you can’t. The situation is too massive for any one person to solve. However, can you do anything about Climate Change? Yes, yes you can.

From my perspective, Climate Change is a leveller. It doesn’t matter about your age, gender, religion, nationality, job, sexual orientation, or anything else; Climate Change affects every single person in the world, in addition to the non-human residents, that we share this spinning ball of rock and water with.

The world’s greatest living science communicator, Sir David Attenborough, recently said at COP26 (26th summit of Conference of the Parties):

“We are, after all, the greatest problem solvers to have ever existed on Earth.” “If working apart, we are a force powerful enough to destabilise our planet. Surely working together, we are powerful enough to save it.”

That man is 95 years old, and he can still kick more arse in one day, that I can do in my entire life. With that message, what can any one person do, to reduce the amount of CO₂ in the Earth’s atmosphere? You can do it by making small changes in your lifestyle, but also inspiring others to change as well.

Slowing down Climate Change, can seem quite over whelming for a species, let only for a single person. Having said that, here are some simple lifestyle choices, that can help you reduce your CO₂ emissions, on a daily basis. You don’t have to sacrifice anything, it’s all about making small changes, that slowly add up.

I need to point something out: Climate Change was not caused by you, and you alone. It’s not your personal responsibility to fix this problem; however you are more than entitled to help, and inspire others to help as well.

Central and local governments; international, national, and local companies; corporations; and communities, all have to help, not just you. There are many factors that stand in our way like technology, poverty, taxes, employment, politics, laws, and the economy, that need to be considered and solved.

This is because my CO₂ emissions, will be different from somebody living in the USA, or Libya, or Ghana, or China, or any other place that ends with the letter “A”. You however, are allowed to make other people care, so they can act too.

Small changes can be:

• Switching to an electric car or lawnmower.
• Setting up a car pool.
• Riding more public transportation.
• Walking or cycling more.
• Buying local produce.
• Buying and planting more trees.
• Eating less meat.
• Turning off electricity, when you don’t need it.

These changes can help with the battle against Climate Change, but if we as a species want to win this war, we need to get very serious, very quickly. If you want real changes against rising CO₂ emissions, then you only have one last resort: democracy.

Large changes can be:

The answer is about elections, in particular, voting. To really bring about meaningful and positive results in the campaign of lowering CO₂ emissions, we need to do two things: influence the decision makers; and vote into power, people whom are passion about solving this problem. The decision and law makers hold the future of life on this planet in their hands; it’s our job to convince them to save this world.

You need to get them to care.

At local and national elections, you should look for candidates that have strong Climate Change polices, and vote for them. We do not need any more people of authority, dismissing or not understanding how severe the situation is. We need the right polices, the right technology and the right people in power.

It’s up to us to put them there, so they can execute our will and solve the problem of Climate Change; and we need it now.

Before I go and stop UMC1 and UMC2 from jumping on their beds again, I want to credit and thank Kurzgesagt for their Climate Change video. Their video can explain things to a far better clarity on the topic, than I could ever hope to achieve.

They are not a sponsor, because I am not popular enough to be sponsored; I just love their work. They are the best at what they do, and what they do is amazing.

To quote Jonathan Hickman, the writer of East of West:

“No. It’s not a game. This is the world. It is not the one we were supposed to have, but it’s the one we made. We did this. We did it with open eyes and willing hands. We broke it, and there is no putting it back together. But I’m damned already… so at least I’m going to try.”

With fighting Climate Change, we need to do better. I’m in; are you?

Thanks for reading and I’ll see you next week.

¹ You know what they say; you should never assume, because it makes an ass out of you and me.

I want to talk about face masks. Why? Because after at least 18 months, a face mask of all things, has become a political symbol. The thing is, you already know this. You’ve read about it, heard about it, and quite honestly have talked about it.

All around the globe, mask wearing has been a hot button subject, and I feel a lot of the discussions about them has been centred on the science fact vs science fantasy debate. Do masks actually work? By wearing a mask, can it reduce the risk of you contracting COVID-19? The answer to both of these questions is yes.

There are several myths surrounding the COVID-19 vaccines, which I took apart in my previous blogs. It’s interesting to note that a lot of anti-vaxxers, are also against wearing face masks; whether it’s for religious, political, moral or scientific reasons. So now it’s time for some mask wearing facts!

FACT 1: Wearing a mask, is one of the best ways to reduce the spread of COVID-19.

FACT 2: You can not reinfect yourself with COVID-19, by wearing a mask.

FACT 3: Wearing a face mask, does not decrease your oxygen levels.

FACT 4: Even if you don’t have any COVID-19 symptoms, you should still wear a mask.

FACT 5: You don’t need to mock and ridicule anybody, for wearing a face mask.

FACT 6: COVID-19 precautions like hand washing and social distancing, should still be used along with mask wearing.

FACT 7: Cloth face masks can still protect you from COVID-19.

FACT 8: Your carbon dioxide levels will not increase, when using a face mask.

FACT 9: Wearing a face mask, protects the wearer and the people around them.

FACT 10: Wearing a face mask, will not weaken your immune system.

FACT 11: By wearing a face mask, does not mean you will develop pneumonia.

FACT 12: A child wearing a face mask, is not abuse; it’s actually sensible parenting.

FACT 13: A face mask is only effective, as long your nose and mouth are covered.

FACT 14: Even if you are vaccinated, you should still wear a mask.

FACT 15: You don’t need to wear a face mask while exercising.

FACT 16: As the designated shopper for my house, I had the joy of going to the supermarket during lockdown. While I was there, I noticed a lot of single guys; with their white bread, pies and beer filled trollies, testing out a new flirting technique: “Hey, I like your mask,” hoping a conversation could flow from there.

As opening lines go, it’s better than, “Did it hurt when you fell from heaven, because you’re an angel,” but not as good as, “Falling in love with you takes less time than my DNA takes to replicate.”

If you have the opportunity to wear a mask, please do it. Not just for yourself, but for the people around you. The science behind face masks is rock solid, so please be brave and wear a face mask.

We are currently at Level 2 with our national lockdown, with some other regions still at the highest level, which is Level 4. That being the case, this is my last lockdown post, until we have another one. Maybe. Until then, I’ll return to my regular scheduled programming of geeky content.

Until then, mask up, get a vaccine, wash your hands, and look after yourselves and your families.

Thanks for reading and I’ll see you in a few days!

We are still in lockdown currently in New Zealand, though we are slowly moving down the levels. Sadly, this means that COVID-19 vaccine myths are still floating around on social media and across the dinner table. In my last blog, I looked at some of the insanity surrounding five COVID-19 vaccine myths, so today I aim to finish what I started with five more.

Myth 6: The COVID-19 vaccine is making people magnetic.

Reality: I want you to really think about this; people are claiming that a vaccine is giving them magnetic powers. Now if Magento or Doctor Polaris were claiming this, my reply would be, “How could you tell?”

Human magnetism; it sounds like the next step in human evolution, but it’s not. There have been numerous people involved with articles, photographs and video footage, around this subject. They are claiming that after they have received the COVID-19 vaccine (I don’t think it’s been cleared up which one they are talking about), metal objects like phones, spoons, knives, forks, etc, can now stick to their body.

I saw some hilarious footage in America, with people standing up in court to testify that the COVID-19 vaccine had made them magnetic, because of microchips in the vaccine or some other insane reason.

Let’s clear this up quickly, not a single case of magnetism has been found, by someone receiving the COVID-19 vaccine. It’s not possible.

To clarify:

• There are no metallic, microelectronics or magnetic materials in the vaccines.
• There is nothing in the vaccine that can produce the electromagnetic force, at the vaccination point or in your body.
• A dose of the COVID-19 vaccine is usually less than a millilitre, which means the shot is too small to carry a microchip.
• You have iron in your blood, but it’s not ferromagnetic; which means it’s not receptive to magnetism. This means it can’t build or interact with an electromagnetic force field.
• If you were a human magnet, only steel or iron objects would be an attracted to your body, not silver ones, like in the anti-vaxxer videos.

To me, this myth is utter garbage, so please ignore it.

Myth 7: The COVID-19 vaccine makes women infertile.

Reality: The old anti-vaxxer crazy train, is breaking new ground now. Apparently, thousands of women across the world, have been made infertile by receiving the COVID-19 vaccine; in addition to the claim that a woman could be made infertile, simply by standing next to a vaccinated person. Really?

I believe these misinformed people think that while different drug companies have been developing the vaccines, they never thought about testing pregnant women?! Really?

Throughout the different vaccine trials and phases, pregnant women, women that are trying to conceive and those that are breastfeeding were studied, and no adverse effects on fertility were seen. Source: Celine Gounder, an infectious disease specialist at NYU and Bellevue Hospital.

The COVID-19 vaccine does not cause infertility in women. If it did, it would not have been approved by medical authorities for public use.

Myth 8: The COVID-19 vaccine gives you COVID-19.

Reality: Anti-vaxxers want you to believe that by receiving the COVID-19 vaccine, you are actually having the virus injected into you, so then, you’ll get sick.

Some COVID-19 vaccines do contain an inactivated or weakened version of the virus, to stimulate your immune system, however you can’t catch COVID-19 from this. mRNA vaccines like Pfizer, do not have any live or dead strains of COVID-19. You can not contract COVID-19 from a COVID-19 vaccine. This is nonsense, once again.

Myth 9: People that are vaccinated are catching COVID-19, proving the vaccines don’t work.

Reality: Let’s break this statement down; firstly, the notion that some people that have been partly or fully vaccinated, have contracted COVID-19, is actually true. It is.

However the problem with this is not calling the efficacy of the vaccines into question, but rather explaining how vaccinated people can contract COVID-19. These people are called breakthrough cases, and the reasons why this happens, can be quite varied.

No vaccine is 100% proof, so the vaccine is different from one person to the next, in terms of their immune system and immune response. Your immune response can be weakened or boosted by medications, age and overall health, and people with a weakened immune system, do have a higher chance of becoming a breakthrough case.

Having a COVID-19 vaccine does not make you 100% bullet proof against COVID-19, but it can lower the risks of you being infected, supported by social distancing, mask wearing, wash handing and using sanitisers. The largest group in the community that has the greatest risk for transmission for the virus are the unvaccinated. It’s a simple, but tragic fact.

If 100 people were exposed to COVID-19, it means that 80-90 vaccinated people, would not get any symptoms, but 10-20 people may get symptoms, with 5 people needing hospitalisation. The COVID-19 vaccines actually do work.

Myth 10: People are dying after receiving the COVID-19 vaccines.

Reality: It’s true, there has been reports of some people that have received the COVID-19 vaccine have died, but correlation doesn’t equal causation. An example of this issue is the serial killer scenario. Let’s say serial killers prefer to kill people during summer or hotter months. This might mean, that during this period serial killers would eat ice cream as a treat; therefore we can link serial killers and ice cream! Eating ice cream turns you into a serial killer!

But eating ice cream does not turn you into a serial killer, just the same as people dying after their vaccination, does not mean the vaccine killed them. You could discover that 500 people were vaccinated over 24 hours in your home town. After a week, you track them all down to gauge the effects of the vaccination, only to discover that 5 people have died.

You assume that the one thing they all had in common was the vaccination, so you assume that the vaccine killed them, because they died after the vaccination was given to them. However, you later learn that two people were killed in car accident, one person had a heart attack, one person drowned and one person was shot.

It’s true, all five people died after receiving the COVID-19 vaccine, but the vaccine did not kill them. They could have died for any reason, especially if there was an underling health issue. Correlation does not equal causation.

Conclusion: Vaccinations, in my small and humble opinion, could quite possibly be the single greatest invention in human history and also the world’s best tool to eradicate diseases, that cause avoidable deaths in children and adults.

Basically, you don’t get the COVID-19 vaccine for yourself; you get it for your grandparents, your children, the people that are immune compromised or people for other medical reasons, that can not take the vaccine. You get the vaccine to protect other people, like others are doing it for you. By protecting other people, you protect yourself. Any 1980’s Saturday morning cartoon character could tell you that.

I received my first COVID-19 vaccination on Sunday 5th September, which was Father’s Day. It was a Father’s Day present, but it wasn’t for me; it was for UMC1 and UMC2. Also, I have not gained magnetic powers; big surprise there!

If you are unsure about the vaccine, please go and talk to your doctor about your vaccine concerns. It’s alright to have concerns about the vaccine, but please talk to a medical professional about it.

I think the COVID-19 vaccines are miracles, but that’s just my geeky opinion. For the next blog, I’m going to debunk the myths surrounding masks, because the anti-vaxxers are not staying in their lane.

Until then, mask up, get a vaccine, wash your hands, and look after yourselves and your families.

Thanks for reading and I’ll see you in a few days!

Lockdown, lockdown, lockdown. I think this second national lockdown is bringing out some interesting behaviour in people; though it’s not limited to humans. I’ll do my best to explain, but since I’m on lockdown time, things will get done, when they get done.

I love that during lockdown, the highlight of your day, could be a solo trip to the supermarket. Whether it’s for some small or large items, you mask up and off you go. It’s so satisfying and so sad at the same time, though. It’s a strange feeling being the designated shopper, because to me, it’s like you’re being rewarded and punished altogether.

The days are starting to merge into each together, so the only way to identify any of them, is to mark Wednesday on the calendar, which is bin day. The arrival of the rubbish and recycling trucks has fast become a weekly highlight to our household, as well as other homes.

Beady eyed children can be seen peering through their windows, staring at the trucks; along with their parents. Previously, the arrival of the trucks would have escaped the attention of a lot of parents, but now they are just as excited to witness the trucks appear, as their children.

Speaking of windows, I have tried very hard to raise my kids to not judge people by their appearance. Whether it’s by their gender, religion, race, you name it, we have discussed it. That policy is in the bin, thanks to lockdown.

We all eat lunch by the front window now, passing the time and some type of judgment on anything or anyone we see now. It could be their shoes, car, hair, jacket or even a dog; the family that judges together, stays together. This is our new form of entertainment.

I’ve also noticed a few odd things during lockdown in my house. One is that my house has slowly turned into a museum of Lego and Duplo projects. There are space shuttles, space probes and starships in the hallway; fire engines and police cars under the table; a train outside the bathroom; a construction site in the boys’ room; a submarine and a dump truck in the kitchen; and for some unknown reason, there is a postie that is sitting on a flying pizza delivery motorcycle, on my bedside cabinet.

Apparently UMC1 and UMC2 are not claiming ownership of these vehicles, but I am not allowed to move them, in case the owner or owners came back. Seriously, these projects are driving me crazy, because I feel like I’m Godzilla that has to walk carefully through a city, so I don’t destroy anything.

Another problem is that the couch in the lounge keeps exploding every 15 minutes, but luckily it’s only the cushions that end up on the floor, and nobody has been injured yet. In a totally unrelated matter, UMC1 and UMC2 have informed me that the floor in the lounge has sadly turned into lava. I had no idea my house was a prime location for convection, since the house was so obviously been built over a hot spot.

How do you judge success? During this lockdown, it’s just making everybody get out of their pyjamas before 11am; the beds get actually made; everybody gets fed; teeth get brushed; nobody gets divorced; and the dog gets a walk. The bar is set very low indeed.

ZOOM calls can be a bit dicey at the moment. I feel conflicted about having ZOOM meetings and calls, while sometimes wearing pyjama pants. Also, have you ever tried to take a ZOOM meeting or a call, with two children under 7 years old in the house?

It takes a lot of self control, not to bury my head in my hands during a ZOOM session, when my youngest son enters into the room to proclaim that he has removed his underwear, because he is now a rocket sensor, and rocket sensors don’t wear underwear.

He then flings his undies at me, to stress how serious he is about not wearing underwear. I have no idea about what exactly is a rocket sensor; but we have introduced a new rule in the house: Even rocket sensors have to wear underwear.

New Zealand society is also starting to change and an example of this are the cats. Yes, you heard me correctly, the cats. I live in a cul-de-sac that does not get a huge amount of traffic. Because of this, the cats in the neighbourhood tend to wander about, wherever they want…because they’re cats.

The thing is, since we have gone into lockdown, the cat population has become seriously more assertive. Instead of a cat visiting our property once every three days, we are getting three-four cats, every single day. Our dog is enjoying chasing them away, though to be fair, during lockdown he is unofficially off duty.

The cats are now sitting on the footpath and the road like they have claimed everything. Some of them stretch out and to go sleep. They are everywhere. If you were walking on the footpath and met a cat before lockdown, they would quickly get up and run away.

Not now though. Now, if you are walking along the footpath and encounter a cat, they refuse to move. Whether you step round them or step over them, they will not move. Even if a cat is sitting in the middle of the road, and a car is driven towards them, they will not move. It’s almost like they are saying “You want me to move? Come and make me.”

I’m not sure if it’s because the cats are slowly taking over the neighbourhood or they are just sick of lockdown and they don’t want to spend extra time with their families. I’m not intelligent enough to know the answer.

In addition to this, we have an issue at multiple supermarkets across the country. Some supermarkets have been running out of toilet paper and it’s getting that bad, some stores are restricting one bag of toilet paper per customer. I can think of only two reasons for the shortage: Either the entire population of New Zealand have diarrhoea or people are stockpiling toilet paper, because they’re selfish; and I don’t know which scenario is worse.

I have also noticed the rise in anti-vaxxing and anti-mask content, both locally and nationally. Because these two delightful little misinformed groups have actually managed to push my science literacy buttons, I’m going to donate the next two blog posts addressing myths and claims surrounding mask wearing and COVID-19 vaccines.

Until then, mask up, get a vaccine, wash your hands, and look after yourselves and your families.

Thanks for reading and I’ll see you in a few days!

At the time I’m writing this blog post, we have entered our second national lockdown, because of the appearance of the COVID-19 Delta Variant within the community. Now I’m not going to talk about the dangers of the Delta Variant or the need for higher vaccination rates. That could be an entire blog post by itself!

What I really want to talk about are the people that are helping, which is actually everybody. Sorry, this is basically a long overdue thank you letter. I realise many other people have done this before, but I still want to say thank you.

Thank you to the scientists and researchers that have dedicated hundreds of hours in developing COVID-19 vaccines.

Thank you to the frontline medical workers that are administering and analysing COVID-19 tests, as well as conducting the vaccinations.

Thank you to doctors and nurses that are working at hospitals treating COVID-19 patients, as well as running and operating clinics.

Thank you to emergency management workers like police, firefighters and paramedics, that are still working.

Thank you to the teachers doing online learning from their homes, while looking after their own children.

Thank you to the children giving up birthday parties with their friends and playing at the park.

Thank you to the farmers that are working hard to produce our food.

Thank you to the cleaners that are keeping public spaces clean and safe.

Thank you to health officials that are educating us about COVID-19 prevention and vaccines.

Thank you to the media for providing us with up to date information.

Thank you to our families for continuing to put up with us.

Thank you to the aged care workers for keeping our elderly safe.

Thank you to petrol station workers for being there.

Thank you to the public for staying home to save lives.

Thank you to the truck drivers that are moving freight and goods around the nation.

Thank you to the posties and courier drivers for keeping us sane, with your deliveries.

And finally, thank you to the supermarket workers for actually turning up and providing us with what we need.

I know this blog post is not very entertaining, however Lockdown Edition Part 2, will be about my observations about my family and society during lockdown.

See you in a few days and thanks for reading!

I want to talk about conspiracy theories. Why? Because everybody loves a good conspiracy theory. Whether it’s Barack Obama was born in Kenya; toothpaste has mind controlling drugs in it; the Earth is hollow; the existence of Bigfoot; 9/11 was an inside job; space is a hoax; Coke vs New Coke; chemtrails; AIDS was created by scientists; Paul Rudd is immortal; and there are no Olsen twins, it’s just one person.¹

Why people believe in conspiracy theories, is not the basis on this blog. I am going to focus on what they actually believe; in fact, just six conspiracy theories. Six conspiracy theories that are insane, mental, crazy and utter lunacy.

There are many crazy arsed conspiracy theories floating around in this beautiful world of ours. There is a lot, but these six…well, let’s just say they upset me for different reasons. Mainly, they deal with misinformation, disinformation and a lot of falsehoods.

I have organised these conspiracy theories into three groups. The first group contains the conspiracy theories that I view as harmless and idiotic. What I mean is that believing in any conspiracy theory in this group, will not get people hurt, killed and cause offense. Just other people shaking their heads, thinking “Do they seriously believe that?”²

The second group is reserved for conspiracy theories that; to me; are highly offensive to a lot of people. Once you read it, you’ll understand.

Finally the third group, this is where people believing in these conspiracy theories, have a direct and harmful to you and other people. Basically, believing in these conspiracy theories actually negatively impacts the world.

I do feel the need to point out a warning though; this blog is not very funny, because conspiracy theories; to some degree are not funny, so I’ve been more serious than I should. Sorry.

So, let’s look at this delightful, charming selection of wonderful, well thought out conspiracy theories, that…upset me.

Group 1: Harmless

Flat Earth

Let’s start with the Mother Goose of conspiracy theories: Flat Earth. Ok, so a believer of this conspiracy theory is called a Flat Earther. They believe that instead of the Earth being a spinning globe, that orbits the Sun; the Earth is actually a flat plane with the Sun orbiting Earth, above us. The Flat Earth theory tends to be a somewhat gateway theory, to larger and even crazier theories out there; said Alice as she tumbled down the rabbit hole of YouTube videos.

There are several different versions of the Flat Earth model; because funnily enough, they can not agree on an official model. The main points on a Flat Earth are that: the Earth is flat; the Earth is stationary; the edge of the Earth is surrounded by a gigantic ice wall, which is in fact, Antarctica; the Earth is enclosed underneath a dome; and the Sun and the Moon are enclosed in the dome with us. Apparently the Sun and the Moon are the same size!

The conspiracy part of this theory is that NASA (National Aeronautics and Space Administration) ESA (European Space Agency) and every other space agency; along with governments from around the globe,³ are suppressing the information about the world being flat, while lying to us on a daily basis.

Now, in my humble opinion, for someone to believe in this, you need to reject or deny a lot of things. Things like planetary evolution, stellar evolution, classical mechanics, Newtonian physics, plate tectonics, the general theory of relativity, Magellan’s circumnavigation, Earth’s 15 degree per hour drift, Kepler’s laws of planetary motion, the Heliocentric model, photographs from space and the list goes on.⁴

You also need to disbelieve that various people have already discovered the Earth was a globe, from Ancient Greek philosophers (scientists) like Pythagoras to Aristarchus to Eratosthenes, going back 2,500 years ago, using observations and calculations.

Among many things that upset me about this nonsense, is that these reality challenged people still can not explain or debunk the problem of the horizon or to prove the existence of the dome! Basically, to me, believing in the Flat Earth theory is harmless. Idiotic and crazy, but still harmless. We have known the Earth is a globe for thousands of years, but apparently, some people still have not got the message. Maybe 5G is to blame?

Evolution deniers

Now the people that believe in this conspiracy theory, are exactly what would expect: evolution deniers. They believe in creationism or intelligent design and reject the long established theory of evolution. Basically they are anti-evolution. I know, I know, the list does not get any better.

The conspiracy theory is that the elite; mainstream media; and scientists want to control the narrative about this subject and steer to towards evolution and away from thing else. They can claim that fossils are fake, research is biased, or information can be reinterpreted. Also the notion that humans could be related to apes, is quite a sore point.

This has brought the debate about whether creationism should be taught in public schools, instead of evolution; or at least along side it, in many countries over the years; aka the science vs religion dilemma.

What upsets me, is that much like Earth being spherical, evolution is a proven scientific fact; yet people living in the 21st century, still deny it. They reject the mountain of research and information from world class scientists like Alfred Russel Wallace; Richard Dawkins; Julian Huxley; Eugenie Scott; Gregor Mendel; Julian Huxley; August Weismann; Theodosius Dobzhansky; Eugene Dubois; Georges-Louis Leclerc, Comte de Buffon; Charles Darwin and hundreds of others.

They also reject the the concepts and evidence of adaptation; homology; genetics; natural selection; niches; cladograms; molecular clocks; anagenesis; genetic drift; atavisms; and one of my favourites, convergent evolution.

Not accepting the evolution theory, is to me, just lunacy. Just like the Flat Earth theory, the believers of the Anti-Evolution theory are harmless. These people are misinformed and misguided, but harmless.

The Moon Landing

Now this conspiracy theory is lazy. Just, really lazy. Believers of this one, claim that not only is space not real, but the Apollo 11 Moon Landing in 1969, was actually fake.⁵ They believe that the whole event was filmed in a Hollywood studio, with Stanley Kubrick as the possible director.

They also claim several camera shots; angles of shadows; lighting sources; lack of stars; lack of blast crater; environmental and transmissions issues; along with other things, all point to the lunar landing to be staged, with the astronauts as paid actors.

To me, this is just crazy talk. Every single insane claim of NASA trickery, can actually be explained with logic, science and information. What makes me laugh is; if this conspiracy theory is to be believed, not one person involved in this cover up has come forward with real evidence. After 50 years?!

Is the reason this has not happened, because of how well the hundreds; if not thousands of people involved, have remained silent? Or is it because there is no cover up?

What upsets me about this conspiracy theory, is that a motivated and dedicated group of people, dreamt big and did something that changed the fate of human history, has become a meme mocking joke with some idiots and at the same time, belittling their achievements, by people claiming it never happened. It’s just utter nonsense to call the Moon Landing fake. It really is. Believers of this conspiracy theory are just so wrong, but at the end of the day, they are harmless.

So, the first group contains conspiracy theories that are pretty crazy, but they are harmless. If you meet any believers of these theories, you may be torn between giving them a hug and saying you forgive them for their insane ramblings, versus sitting them down and painfully and patiently explaining to them, why those conspiracy theories are wrong.

Group 2: Offensive

The second group could be a little bit more difficult to forgive. This group contains people that believe certain acts of horrific crimes towards humanity, have been over estimated or even claiming the crimes never took place. Yes, this group is about Holocaust and Genocide deniers. Sorry, there is nothing funny about this group.

Why people believe in this…well, I am not smart enough to answer that question. This conspiracy theory covers the Armenian Genocide, Bosnian and Serb Genocides, The Holodomor, Bangladesh Genocide, Cambodian Genocide, Nanjing Massacre, Rwandan Genocide and even the Holocaust; along with sadly, a lot more.

What makes it even more disturbing are the Rohingya Genocide in Myanmar and the Uyghur Genocide in North Western China, which are happening in real time; along with people denying both genocides are happening. Genocides are being committed right now in the world, however some people claim it’s all a hoax.

To me, it’s totally offensive to the people being murdered right now and the thousands of families, that have lost loved ones over the years, to have this filth being spread. To deny these crimes, or at least down play the damage that has been done, is an affront to our humanity and these vile conspiracy theories must called out. Every. Single. Time.⁶

Group 3: Dangerous

Climate Change deniers

You knew this was coming, didn’t you? I mean, how could I make a list of insane conspiracy theories and not have Climate Change deniers. Now, if you didn’t already know, people that believe in this little gem, say that against overwhelming scientific evidence; climate change is not actually happening. It’s fake; a hoax. However, even it’s a possibility that it is real, humans are not the cause of it. Some how is all about some scientists, trying to push their own agenda on to the world.

It’s a lot to digest I know; but let’s push on shall we? These people can fall into two groups: the first group believes that climate change is not happening at all; so let’s all calm down. The second group is reserved for people that accept climate change is real, but it’s not humans warming the planet, it’s part of the Earth’s natural cycle.

I have many issues with the believers of this craziness. Whether it’s the first group with simply denying that climate change does not exist or the second group passing the buck onto someone, because “…we didn’t make the mess, why should we clean it up?” They feel that that emotional, financial, physical sacrifices are too much for humanity to curb climate change, so why should they change anything about their behaviour?

These people also like using the term “global warming”, because it gives them the necessary tools to dismantle the argument. “It can’t be global warming, if we are getting colder temperatures.” or “It’s so wet and cold today, what happened to global warming?”

These people don’t understand, with rising CO₂ levels around the world, will cause the average global temperature to increase. However, the implications of this is that the colder regions of this planet, will get colder. They will experience colder temperatures and more extreme colder weather. The reverse can be said about the hotter areas, because they will just keep getting hotter.

Plus, we have not even addressed the environmental dangers faced by the non-human residents of this planet, from polar bears and other arctic creatures moving south to the rising acidity levels in the oceans, because of CO₂ build up.

The Earth’s climate is changing in real time, because of what humans are doing. To deny this, is to me; denying reality. This is extremely dangerous to you, your family and to everybody. If nine out of ten doctors state smoking is harmful to you, why would you listen to the one doctor that states the opposite? So if nine climate scientists state that climate change is real and humans are the cause of it, why in the nine levels of Dante’s hell, why would you listen to the one scientist that says climate change is a hoax? The answer is that it’s easier.

Anti-Vaxxers

As a parent, I think this conspiracy theory is the worse. Believers of the Anti-Vaxxing conspiracy theory; known as Anti-Vaxxers, have the mad impression that vaccinations simply do not work, and they are wrong/evil, so they will not vaccinate themselves; but more importantly, their children.

They believe that the drug companies, governments and certain important people around the world, have been seducing and tricking people into…saving themselves and their family?

For my own understanding, Anti-Vaxxers build their argument that vaccinations are unsafe around three major points; 1.) the different reactions that people receive after having a vaccination; 2.) a child developing autism after a vaccination; in particular, the MMR ( measles, mumps, and rubella) vaccine; 3.) they claim because their children were not vaccinated and have not developed any diseases, this proves that vaccinations are a hoax.

Now before I go on, I need to point out that vaccinations are a form of medicine. And just like any medicine, there can be reactions to it. Nothing is 100% safe to 100% of the population. People can be allergic to something that is known to them or unknown. Because of this, some people develop reactions to different vaccines.

This can range from the most common symptoms like pain, swelling, or redness where the shot was administered; mild fever; muscle and joint aches; headaches; feeling tired; chills; and fainting. It’s interesting to note that these side effects, are a signal that your body is beginning to create an immunity against the disease. (Vaccines, 2021).

Some serious side effects from vaccines can be difficulty breathing; swelling of your face and throat; a fast heartbeat; a bad rash all over your body; dizziness and weakness. (Vaccines, 2021). Because of these side effects, Anti-Vaxxers claim that this proves vaccinations are actually dangerous and should be outlawed. It’s funny, because you have a greater chance of getting struck by lightning, than developing a side effect of a vaccination.

Let’s now look at the autism debate. Anti-Vaxxers will state time, and time again, about the links between autism and vaccinations. This dates back to a British doctor, when in 1998, published a paper claiming direct links between autism and the MMR vaccine. Because of this, researchers wanted to investigate the claim, so they did a series of studies, covering thousands of children that received the MMR vaccine against thousands of children whom never received the vaccine.

Can you guess the result? The rate of autism was the same for both groups. This resulted in the original paper being withdrawn and widely discredited, while the doctor was struck off the medical register. There are no links between autism and the MMR vaccine. Autism is not caused by the MMR vaccine.⁷ It is bonkers to suggest anything else.

The last argument can be summed up with herd immunity. If 24 out of 25 children in a classroom have been immunised, the 24 children will help protect the one child that is not immunised. By having the greater population of children and adults being vaccinated in the community, this means they are protected; but also they can protect the people that are not vaccinated.

Vaccinations, in my small and humble opinion, could quite possibly be the single greatest invention in human history and also the world’s best tool to eradicate diseases, that cause avoidable deaths in children and adults.

If an Anti-Vaxxer starts talking about how their child is not vaccinated and they are fine; it’s because of the other children being vaccinated around them, have kept their child safe, by not allowing the disease to spread to them. Also considering the global COVID-19 crisis, I wonder how Anti-Vaxxers view the world now?

I believe you have the right not to vaccinate yourself and your children if you choose to; but you can not argue with the science behind it.

I was going to entertain discussing the conspiracy theory about QAnon and the US 2020 election….but I decided not to. I don’t want to give it any more oxygen than it already has. Plus it’s just bat-shit crazy.

So what should you do, if you ever meet anybody from these groups? Just smile and be polite; and don’t bring up any of this insanity. It’s not worth it. However, if they start trying to educate you on their truth….well, you have permission to enlighten them. Let’s change the world, with one crazy conspiracy theorist at a time.

Thanks for reading and see you in a fortnight!

References:

Vaccines. (2021). Vaccines Side Effects. Retrieved from https://www.vaccines.gov/basics/safety/side_effects

¹ This important conspiracy theory was brought to the world’s attention by John Oliver. Thanks, John.

² Yes, 100% they do.

³ Pun intended.

⁴ Everything I just listed is above reproach.

⁵ Many Flat Earthers believe in this conspiracy theory as well, because since NASA is lying about a Flat Earth, so why wouldn’t they be lying about the Moon Landing?

⁶ Sorry, I think this group of people could quite possibly annoy me the most.

⁷ Autism is actually a highly genetic disorder.