Month: May 2023

The Entertainment differences between my Wife and I

On By somegeektoldme@gmail.comIn Books, Literature, Movies, Television

I want to talk about my wife. Why? Considering she’s the only other adult in my house, we do have a lot in common. I mean, we did get married, so we must actually like each other. We both enjoy various pop culture franchises like Doctor Who, Star Wars, Harry Potter, and the list could go on and on.

We both love reading and eating pizza, as well as sharing a hatred of housework. We’re also in agreement that something very strange is happening with our local corner shop, because the hours they’re open are truly bizarre.

There are many other similarities between us, but they are not as interesting as the differences concerning entertainment.

If you can break it all down, there are two major differences between us. The first is…it’s still difficult to acknowledge this publicly, but my wife enjoys Sour Cream and Chives. I know what you’re thinking; how did a Salt and Vinegar-loving and Sour Cream and Chives-hating guy like myself, end up being married to a Sour Cream and Chives-loving and Salt and Vinegar-hating woman? No one is perfect or infallible; except God, Chuck Norris, and Sir David Attenborough.

One day I’ll write about a pair of star-crossed lovers, meeting over a packet of Chicken chips, but today is not this day.

Image by JayMantri from Pixabay

The second major difference is the consumption of entertainment; such as novels, movies, and tv shows. Let’s start with movies, shall we? I enjoy movies, either watching them at home or at the cinema; because everybody loves watching a movie in the dark with 100 other random people, while eating overpriced food.

The way I view movies can easily fall into two groups: movies I’ve seen before and movies I’ve never seen. There are a lot of movies that I would love to see again, whether they are one of my favourites, or if they are part of a series with a new addition coming out, so I want to familiarise myself with the plot and characters again. That sounds fair, right?

On the other hand that is not holding a lightsabre, there are new movies that I want to see; which to be honest is the majority of the two. Do I want to see every new movie that’s released? No, that’s insane, plus I would be broke. I just want to see some particular new movies, for whatever particular odd reason.

Ok, but what about my wife? She’s like me, that she can enjoy rewatching a favourite movie. This is something that she likes and is comfortable with. She knows the actors, the director, the plot, and the genre, so she knows what to expect. Again, that sounds fair, right?

With new movies, we do have a problem though. My wife does not like watching new movies; mainly ones she knows next to nothing about. She will happily watch a new movie at the cinema or at home, with pre-existing characters that she knows and loves. But ask her to watch a movie where she doesn’t know the characters or the plot? Hell, no. She will not watch it.

There is a loophole to this law: my wife will watch a new movie with characters she has never seen before, if…and only if, she has read the book that the movie is based on. That way, she is guaranteed to know various things about the plot and characters. You can’t expect her to watch a movie that she knows nothing about, can you?

So when it comes time for the two of us to sit and actually watch a movie together, there is a lot of discussion and negotiating involved.

Books are also treated the same way for both of us; to a point. I will reread my favourite books, but my main focus is reading new material. I have said this before, but my reading pile is reproducing asexually because it’s grown to five piles which are now sitting on my set of drawers. I have to apologise to them daily for not reading them fast enough; I have a Star Wars book that’s been sitting there for three years and counting.

Would you like to know where my wife’s reading pile lives? Those books are sitting next to the other books on the shelves, that she has already read! When my wife finishes reading a series, “What should I read next?” would be the next question. If you’re thinking, “You should read a book you’ve never read before”, then you don’t know my wife.

She will simply look through the shelves and select a book series that she has already read 100 times before, and start reading. Why you ask? It’s the same reason as the movies; she already knows the plot and characters; it’s familiar and that means the books are something that she is going to like, because…she has already liked and read them before!

I feel she’s my own personal mogwai, that comes with pop culture rules. There are exceptions to her book law: my wife does not like reading a stand-alone book, that is not part of any series. The biggest reason for this is that if she ever reads and likes the book, where does she go from there? There’s no sequel or prequel, it’s just the end. So would my wife commit her time and energy to a single book? It could go either way.

“Hang on, Scott. If your wife only ever reads books she has already read, then how does she read anything new?” That’s a great question. My wife will only read a new book if it’s based on a movie that she has already seen, or it’s a series of books that has been entirely published; like Twilight, Fifty Shades of Gray, or Harry Potter. This way, she can read the first book right through to the final book, without having to wait for the next book to be published. That’s torture for her, waiting for something to be published or released.

Also if it’s similar to something she already enjoys, like The Hunger Games, then reading the Divergent series is in the same wheelhouse, and it also fits in with her book reading criteria. I’ve known her for 10.5 years, so I understand her logic.

With television shows, you can pretty well guess where this is headed, and you are sort of right. TV shows are divided into four groups; shows that we both watch together, shows that I watch by myself, shows that she watches by herself, and shows neither of us watches.

We both tend to watch tv shows that are based on things that we have already seen, or at least read about; whether it’s a book or a comic. There are exceptions to this of course, like comedies or science-fiction. We’ve learned that if we want to watch a new tv show, we need to mention it to the other person. 90% of the time, the other spouse doesn’t want to watch it and that’s ok; however, with the other 10%, the answer is yes, which is strange, to say the least.

So what can we make of this? If anything, I like reading and watching new material, whereas my wife enjoys immersing herself in familiar content. We are both living with the opposite version of ourselves in terms of entertainment consumption, but nobody is perfect. Except God, Chuck Norris, and Sir David Attenborough.

That’s it for another rant and another week. Thanks once again for reading, following, and subscribing to Some Geek Told Me. Remember to walk your dog; read a banned book; remember the answer is 42; and I’ll see you next week.

My baby is now 5 years old

On By somegeektoldme@gmail.comIn Children, Parents

I want to talk about UMC2. Why? For the people that already know, please just humour me. For those that don’t know, I have two sons, and I refer to them on this blog as UMC1 and UMC2, which stands for Unmatured Clone 1, and Unmatured Clone 2. The running joke is that my wife and I only make clones of myself, hence UMC1 and UMC2.

Sweet? Awesome, I’ll continue. UMC2 recently turned 5 years old, and I feel a bit like Charybdis, but with feelings and hormones. He’s my baby boy, and now he’s five. So I’m left with a question: What does this mean? The short answer is that I don’t know. The long answer is a little more complicated, as you would expect.

Traditionally in New Zealand, a child would start primary school when they turned 5 years old, but legally they don’t need to start until 6 years old; or at least enrolled some where to receive a primary education, like home school. UMC2 is starting primary school in the 1st term of 2024, but that is a blog for another day.

Image by PX41-Media from Pixabay

The point that I’m badly trying to make, is that UMC2 is now old enough to go to school. I can’t speak for any other father; or at least another parent, but it’s a surreal notion to know that my baby boy is old enough to do that.

Both UMC1 and UMC2 make me feel old; especially UMC2, which isn’t that hard, to be honest. Growing up, my home phone number was just four digits long and $1’s worth of 1¢ lollies could send you into a sugar coma. Now days, I feel you need a second mortgage, just to go to the supermarket. We didn’t have multiple streaming services either, we had a VCR and two tv channels.

Anyway, Einstein was right; because of course he was, that time is relative. The last five years experienced by me, have gone extremely quickly. I remember the day UMC2 was born, because we had a home birth and the midwife suggested that I could catch him; though technically we didn’t know his gender during pregnancy. As my wife gave birth to him, I did my best wicketkeeper impression, and caught him with two hands. I was the first person to hold UMC2, which is a truth that will never leave me. Excuse me for a few moments, because my eyes are starting to leak.

Thanks for waiting. I better change the direction of the rant, before I start sobbing and gushing again. My mind wanders a lot, particularly about UMC2’s future. What will it look like? Where will he live? Will he have the opportunity to use a hoverboard, even though it’s currently 7 years behind schedule? Will he marry? Will I be at the wedding? Would I be invited to the wedding?

I can see UMC2 as a teenager explaining a new piece of technology to me, which to him is basic; but to me, I’ll need an university degree to understand it. New lexicon, fashion and pop culture will have to be explained to me, so I hope UMC2 will be patient with…Let’s be honest, that boy will have no patience for his old man. None.

UMC2 is similar to his older brother, but still very different. What works for UMC1, can and will not work for UMC2; but that’s ok. Whatever life lessons UMC1 taught me about being a parent, UMC2 is adding to them. Granted the lessons will be delivered with the washing basket on their head, along with a newly created ripped up cardboard collection, and a treasure box; which is a small yellow plastic box filled with broken items.

Ultimately, I don’t mourn the fact there are technically no preschoolers in my house now. There’s just a new level of shenanigans from two school aged children. Additionally, for recent UMC1 and UMC2 misadventures, there are blogs about my review of their restaurant, and creating a Lego family.

Have you ever had conflicting feelings, when your youngest child turned 5 years old? Please let me know.

Sorry if this blog was a bit odd, but I just needed to empty my mind of this topic, and fill it with things, like rugby and football scores, the politics of Count Binface, and designing the next fort to make in the lounge. Also the FIFA World Cup 2023 starts in under a month, with Australia and New Zealand co-hosting the tournament. Make sure you watch some games!

Thanks once again for reading, following, and subscribing to Some Geek Told Me. Remember to walk your dog; read a banned book; beware supermarket check out operators that actually talk to you, and I’ll see you next week.

Life lessons that music has taught me: Volume 1

On By somegeektoldme@gmail.comIn Music

I want to talk about life lessons. Why? Life lessons can sometimes be extremely easy to learn, understand and accept; like Salt and Vinegar chips being a superior flavour. That’s easy. However, there are some life lessons that are the opposite; they are difficult to understand or accept. They hurt. An example of this is eating Sour Cream and Chives. Your body will never forgive you.

You can learn life lessons from your family, friends, workmates, sports heroes, and even fictional characters, ranging from books to movies. But, what about music? From Nicki Minaj’s Anaconda, to Bill Haley & His Comets’ Rock Around the Clock, to Psy’s Gangnam Style, music can offer us a plethora of life lessons, disguised as pearls of wisdom, or just some bat-shit crazy advice.

Music can offer life lessons to all parts of our lives, from love, money, careers, health, children, injustice, sports, entertainment, sex, politics, and so much more.

Below are some of my favourite lessons or advice (but not all of them) that I’ve learnt from music, while I’ve been travelling around the Sun. Congratulations to anybody with enough time on their hands, that can name every song that’s on this list.

The life lessons are not arranged in any particular order; just as they have come to me. Well, except the last two, because they are rather obvious. At least to me, anyway. Also, I have tried extremely hard to limit one life lesson per artist or band, just to be fair. But since Some Geek Told Me is not a democracy, rules can sometimes be broken.

·         Image by Pexels from Pixabay
  • Don’t look back in anger.
  • Push the tempo.
  • Life isn’t easy for a boy named Sue.
  • Don’t be told what you want, don’t be told what you need.
  • You got to breath and have some fun.
  • Time is a piece of wax falling on a termite, that’s choking on the splinters.
  • Tell me the gospel according to you.
  • ‘Cause nothing’s the same when you wait for something.
  • The world is a vampire.
  • Go make yourself some friends, or you’ll be lonely.
  • ‘Cause your crystal ball ain’t so crystal clear.
  • Regrets collect like old friends.
  • You can take back your memories, they’re no good to me.
  • With your opinion, which is of no consequence at all.
  • So get out your seat and jump around.
  • Love, love is a verb. Love is a doing word.
  • You got it … what it takes. Go get it … where you want it?
  • Is that all you got?, I’ll take your best shot.
  • Everything’s happy underground.
  • ‘Cause there’s good deeds and there is good intention. They’re as far apart as heaven and hell.
  • What do you do when all your enemies are friends?
  • I don’t care what they say about us anyway, I don’t care about that.
  • Could everyone agree that no one should be left alone?
  • Closing time, every new beginning, comes from some other beginning’s end.
  • People crying for freedom, no one hears the sound.
  • Don’t let the days go by.
  • The death of one is a tragedy, the death of millions is just a statistic.
  • A change would do you good.
  • The cover is not the book.

My wife’s contribution to this list is: Life’s a bitch and then you die.

And now for the two rather obvious life lessons from music. This is the best gambling advice I’ve heard from music:

You got to know when to hold ’em, know when to fold ’em.
Know when to walk away and know when to run.
You never count your money when you’re sittin’ at the table.
There’ll be time enough for countin’ when the dealing’s done.

And this is one of the best life lessons about history, music has ever taught me:

We didn’t start the fire. It was always burning, since the world’s been turning. We didn’t start the fire. No, we didn’t light it, but we tried to fight it.

Do you agree with any of these life lessons from music, or maybe I left your favourite one out? Please let me know. Additionally I named this blog Volume 1, because I will write Volume 2 soon; there’s so much more to mention! Anyway, that’s it for another weekly rant. I’m making my way through Picard: Season 2, so I’ve got some serious Star Trekking to do.

Thanks once again for reading, following, and subscribing to Some Geek Told Me. Remember to walk your dog; read a banned book; stay away from the Dune Sea, and I’ll see you next week.

My wife’s thoughts on the Coronation of King Charles III

On By somegeektoldme@gmail.comIn History, People, Television

I want to talk about the Coronation of King Charles III. Why? There are two main reasons for this, and I think you can guess the second reason. Let’s back up and start with the first reason. The last British coronation was on 2nd June 1953, when Queen Elizabeth II was crowned, after the death of her father, George VI.

Being a New Zealander and a student of history, watching the coronation of Elizabeth’s son, Charles III, was always a possibility. I mean, coronations don’t happen every week, do they? Maybe in Game of Thrones, but not in real life. The concept of the coronation was fascinating because, like billions of other people, I had never seen a live British coronation.

Image by Sir Jony Ive

Because of the time zone difference, the coronation would be screened live in New Zealand, on Saturday night. Now the thing about last Saturday night, there was no test rugby on; so I could watch the coronation. However would I though? This would require some things to happen: UMC1 and UMC2 would need to be asleep before the coverage began, but I’d also need my wife’s blessing.

You see we have made Saturday night our date night. And when I mean date night, I mean staying at home to either play board games, play a PC Lego game, or watch a movie or tv series. You know, the standard thing that extremely cool people do on a Saturday night.

So I was unsure whether I wanted to watch the coronation. Watching a historic event, or helping Lego Harry Potter to survive Years 5-6? Oh, the agony of making a geek choose. The interesting point is that the decision was actually taken away from me, because my wife suggested we watch the coronation together.

I was stunned at this because my wife is; and I’m quoting her description of herself as, “…a no-frills practical person.” A coronation was one of the last things, I would imagine my wife actually sitting down to watch, but she did it to spend time with her awkward geeky husband, so she scored some great spouse points.

Let’s set the scene, shall we? We’re in the bedroom watching the coverage via the laptop, with my wife sitting on the bed, and I’m in the swivel chair. After playing several games of Uno and waiting for the coronation procession to begin, my wife started her master plan. She knew I’d be listening and watching carefully to the coverage, so she started trying to be funny to annoy me, just because she could. Among many other statements during the coronation’s coverage, my wife set these zingers off:

If this is the scaled back version, I would hate to see what the full on version looks like.

If they were already in the car, why bother with the horses and carriage?

Is that a moat or a wet footpath?

What the hell?! Is that Richie McCaw?!

When the announcer introduced Liz Truss, as being the UK Prime Minister for a brief time, my wife and I both said, “What a burn!”

How many more people are they going to cram in?!

What’s with the Michael Jackson glove?

They would all be screwed if the cue card guy dropped the cards!

Elsa’s coronation wasn’t this bloody long.

A good excuse to wear robes, I guess.

When eating some cheese and crackers, she turned to me and said, “Wilt thou partaketh of these snacks?”

Where are they going? Out the back to sit down? They sat the whole way there and most of the service.

When the coronation procession ended at Buckingham Palace, that was the signal for us to go to sleep. Before we did though, my wife asked if I liked her commentary, because she said that she awesome. It is true, she is awesome; sometimes.

What did you think about the coronation? Was my wife correct? Please let me know. And with that, another weekly rant has ended; though we did have Star Wars Day and Free Comic Book Day.

Thanks once again for reading, following, and subscribing to Some Geek Told Me. Remember to walk your dog; read a banned book; eat French Vanilla ice cream; and I’ll hopefully see you next week.

Happy Free Comic Book Day 2023!

On By somegeektoldme@gmail.comIn Comics1 Comment

Welcome to the second special geek blog for the week! It’s Free Comic Book Day aka FCBD!

Some major things are happening today. Thousands of retailers around the world will open their doors and celebrate comics’ biggest day of the year. They will be giving away free comics across three age ratings: All ages (green logo), Teen (blue logo), and Mature (red logo), which can be identified on the covers.

These comics cover nearly every possible genre you can think of, so there’s something for everybody. I’ll like to point out, that even though the FCBD comics are purposely created for the day, and are given away for free to the public; actually cost the retailer, something like 25 cents per issue. It actually costs them a lot of money to host the event.

Full line up of FCBD Comics

A cool thing about FCBD is cosplaying. Many stores have cosplay competitions to celebrate the day, but others just encourage people to dress up, because they want to. I live 200 km from a comic book store, so I won’t be cosplaying; but if I did, I would cosplay as a tired father, wearing a t-shirt featuring science jokes, and carrying a wallet where my money used to be.

Another place that could be celebrating FCBD, could be your local library. A lot of them will be promoting the graphic novels in their collection, as well as holding cosplay events.

Image by Tania Van den Berghen from Pixabay

If you’re thinking of attending FCBD, so please do it and support your local comic book store. I’ve said this before, but they are the life blood of the industry, so while you’re receiving free comic books, maybe you could have a thorough look around the store. You could find something you didn’t know you needed!

How are you celebrating FCBD? Please let me know. Ok, that’s it for me. Enjoy FCBD and I’ll see you on Monday.

Happy Star Wars Day 2023!

On By somegeektoldme@gmail.comIn Books, Comics, Movies, Television1 Comment

It’s time to celebrate one of the most important days on the Geek calendar. Today is the 4th May; Star Wars Day! Now to say Star Wars Day isn’t a big deal to our family, is a massive understatement. The love for Star Wars in strong in my family. I have it, my wife has it, and our children have it.

From movies, books, comics, toys, board games, cosplay, and tv shows, we love Star Wars. I mean I did get married on Star Wars Day, as well as give UMC2, a Star Wars name. That is next level commitment.

Image by tookapic from Pixabay

Because of this special day, I’d like to share two of our favourite Star Wars books. First is UMC2’s pride and joy; Star Wars: The Secret Life of Droids. He loves this book, and quite often retells information about IG-88, Pit droids, Crab droids, Probe droids, and every other droid, to some unfortunate people at the supermarket.

The second book is Star Wars: Alien Archive. This was given to me as a birthday gift, which contains information and illustrations about the various alien species in the Star Wars universe. I’m not ashamed to admit it, but this book has been quite helpful with reading other Star Wars content. Nice.

And to end this short and zealous blog, I’d like to talk about Power droids, aka Gonk droids. All four of us love Power droids. I mean, who wouldn’t? Anyway, some very creative people, produced a fan film about everybody’s favourite walking battery; it’s awesome. If Disney actually made a real movie or tv show about Power droids, we would all watch it.

Do you celebrate Star Wars Day? Please let me know what you do. That’s it for this special blog, and I’ll see you on Saturday for the second special geek blog. May the Force be with you. Always.

Tour of the Solar System: Mercury

On By somegeektoldme@gmail.comIn Science

Yes that’s right, it’s that time of the month for everybody’s least favourite astronomy blog: My Tour of the Solar System. This is the fourth amazing entry of the tour, so if you’re new, or you don’t know what to do, I promise it’s ok. The three previous entries are: Meet the Family, The Sun, and Planets vs. Dwarf planets.

When we last left the tour, I was waffling on about the differences between planets and dwarf planets, because you know, dwarf planets are a real thing. Seriously. So because of this, we move onto the first planet from the Sun, Mercury.

Mercury. Image by WikiImages from Pixabay

Named after the messenger of the gods in Roman mythology, Mercury is quite odd, considering a few of its siblings are overachievers. Mercury is believed to be 4.5 billion years old, so its quite similar to Earth in age.

Mercury is the smallest planet in our Solar System, with a mean diameter of 4,880 km; which puts it slightly larger than the Moon, at 3,474 km. Basically, if there was an arm wrestle between the two of them, your money should go on Mercury; but keep your cryptocurrency on Earth, because no other planet wants it.

Even though Mercury is the closest planet to the Sun, it is not the hottest; but it’s still worth swiping right. Mercury orbits the Sun at a range of 47 million km (29 million miles) to 70 million km (43 million miles); with an average distance of 58 million km (36 million miles). To put this into perspective, Earth orbits the Sun at an average distance of 150 million km (93 million miles).

Given its proximity to the Sun, Mercury is a hot mess. The length of time it takes for light to travel from the Sun to Mercury, is 192 light seconds or 3.2 light minutes, which is less time to boil an egg.

Temperatures can vary as much as Cookie Monster can eat all of the cookies in a single day. The surface temperatures on Mercury are insanely hot and cold. Day temperatures can reach 430°C (800°F), while night temperatures can plummet to -180°C (-290°F). Because it has no atmosphere, Mercury can’t hold onto the heat during the night, resulting in cold temperatures. Can you imagine the electricity bills?

And like the Flash, Mercury lives up to its namesake. Compared to all of the planets in the Solar System, Mercury is the fastest; even Usain Bolt would be moving like a statue in comparison. Not a Weeping Angel, though. To hell with that.

The further away a planet is from the Sun, the slower it travels; however the opposite is also true. Because Mercury is the closest planet to the Sun, it has the shortest distance to travel around it. This has resulted with Mercury travelling through space at 47 km (29 miles) per second, but it also has some counterintuitive discoveries.

  • Mercury spins slowly on its axis, at a rate of once every 59 Earth days.
  • It takes 88 Earth days for Mercury to orbit the Sun; which equals one Mercury year.
  • It takes 176 Earth days for Mercury to complete one solar Mercury day. Mercury has an elliptical orbit, which means twice during its orbit, it gets quite close to the Sun and speeds up, so it appears the Sun would be going backward; if you were standing on Mercury’s surface.
  • This means one day on Mercury, is longer than a Mercury year.

And just to add some more fun stuff; Mercury has no rings, no natural satellites (moons), plus it is tidally locked with the Sun.

Just like Red, Boober, Mokey, Gobo, and Wembley are all Fraggles; Venus, Earth, Mars, and Mercury are all rocky or terrestrial planets. Mercury looks like our Moon, with craters covering the surface, however with the crust and mantle being made of rock, the core is solid iron. This works out to be 75% of Mercury’s diameter. Because of Mercury’s smaller size, when the core cooled down, it become solid, which made Mercury shrink and caused the surface to wrinkle. This didn’t happen to Earth because it was larger, along with the fact our outer core was liquid, and the inner core was solid.

The majority of the craters on Mercury are actually named after famous artists, composers, and writers. The most famous crater is Caloris Planitia, which is an impact basin, stretching 1,550 km (960 miles) in diameter. For perspective, the length of the United Kingdom is about 1,000 km (600 miles). The Caloris Planitia is surrounded by a ring of mountains; and no, they are not the Ash Mountains, nor the Mountains of Shadow; but rather the Caloris Montes, which are 1-3 km high.

Another reason to swipe right, is the fact that Mercury’s mass is less than 6% of Earth’s. This means Mercury’s gravity is weaker, so if you weighed 70 kg on Earth, you would only weigh 26.6 kg on Mercury. Imagine how high you could jump?

Do you remember what I said about Mercury not having an atmosphere? Good job, you were paying attention. Well, Mercury does have a thin exosphere though. This exosphere is mostly made of oxygen, sodium, hydrogen, helium, and potassium. If you could stand on the surface of Mercury without a protective space suit, the cold, heat or just lack of air, would kill you in under 90 seconds. That’s something to put on the tourism brochure!

All and all, Mercury is a special and unique world, but just like visiting the dentist, you really wouldn’t like to go there. And with that, it’s time to wrap up another tour stop of the Solar System. Yah! This coming week, I’m going to be releasing two special short blogs, celebrating two important days on the Geek calendar. Do you know what they are? The first one will be on Thursday, while the second will be on Saturday. Three blogs in a week? I’ll need a lie down to do this.

Thanks once again for reading, following, and subscribing to Some Geek Told Me. Remember to walk your dog; read a banned book; stop running with scissors; and I’ll see you next week.