One of my simple goals for 2023; not in terms of teaching the public about the dangers of Sour Cream and Chives, is to write more science based content. So to kick the new year off, I’m going to be writing about astronomy; namely the Solar System. Each month I’ll use a badly scratched and well used magnifying glass, to look at some of the stellar1 features within our Solar System.
I chose to write about astronomy, because it’s the first field of science I fell in love with. I didn’t even have to ask its phone number either; though to be fair, if it did give me a phone number, it would be fake. Nice.
I plan on starting off in the centre of the Solar System and slowly work my way out, so with each new month, I’ll be adding a new entry into my expansion pack. They will be full of facts and information, so they may look, sound, and read a bit differently than my other blogs. Hell, it could even be an improvement.
So for the first tour, we’ll be making very brief stops across the Solar System. A quick introduction will be made to each family member, then we’ll move onto the next one. Clear as mud? Great, so you need to strap yourself in, because we’re going to meet the family!
Our first stop of the Solar System is meeting the single parent that looks after the family. The funny thing about this parent, is that it’s actually a fusion reactor. We call it the Sun and just to make sure everybody understands how important the Sun is to us and rest of the family, we need to remember a few small things:
1.) The Sun is actually a star.
2.) The Sun is around 4.5 billion years old.
3.) The Sun’s mass is so large, that everything within the Solar System orbits it. This includes comets, asteroids, planets and us.
Moving on from the Sun; which many of its ex-partners simply can’t do, we need to discuss the siblings; also known as planets. And just like nearly everything, you can place siblings in groups. A person could have a brother or sister, half-brother/half-sister, step-brother/step-sister or an adopted brother or adopted sister.
The same can be said for the planets of the Solar System. They can be grouped into three simple types: terrestrial planets, dwarf planets and gas planets.
The four planets closest to the Sun, in order are Mercury, Venus, Earth (Yay!) and Mars. These are the terrestrial planets, also known as the rock planets or Inner Planets. They are rocky planets that are dense and small, they contain various metals and have a solid physical surface; as well as a few or no natural satellites (moons).
Beyond Mars, the fourth planet from the Sun, and Jupiter, the fifth planet from the Sun, lies a region called the Asteroid Belt. This area of space has millions of asteroids of various sizes, that orbit the Sun as well. It’s here in the Asteroid Belt, that we meet Ceres, the first member of the second group; the dwarf planets.
Just to clear things up, dwarf planets do not have beards, swing axes, enjoy singing, living with princesses, like mining or wear mithril. They are known as dwarf planets because there is a small difference between them and planets. This difference was established by the International Astronomical Union (IAU) in 2006 upon three criteria.
Remember when everyone’s favourite ninth planet from the Sun, Pluto, was demoted from planet to dwarf planet? Pluto remembers, because it failed to achieve one of the three criteria; which I will cover in another blog, very soon. People are still emotional about Pluto getting kicked out of the club, but I will explain it, I promise.
Ok, are you still with me? Great, let’s push on. Now we visit the four gas planets, also known as the gas giants or Outer Planets. These are Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus and Neptune. These planets are different from the Inner Planets, because they filled with different gases, they have no physical surface and they are extremely cold. They also have rings, multiple moons and they’re huge; each one is larger than the Earth.
Past Neptune’s orbit, we have the Kuiper Belt. This region of space could possibly be the source and origin of short-period comets. The Kuiper Belt also has a collection of dwarf planets, which fall under the label of trans-Neptunian objects or TNOs. These include Pluto, Haumea, Makemake and Eris.
There are some other TNOs named Gonggong, Quaoar, Sedna, Orcus and Salacia; and from what I understand, these TNOs have not been given the prestigious title of dwarf planet. Yet.
There are many other parts to our Solar System, but I’ll just be sticking to the Sun, Inner Planets, the Asteroid Belt and Ceres, Outer Planets, along with the Kuiper Belt and dwarf planets for the time being. So the first blog will be about the Sun in February, and I’ll try to put the Solar System post up on the fourth Monday of the month. Maybe, though it depends on how enthusiastic I feel.
This side mission is different for me, so I hope it makes sense. Alright that’s it, go watch some football, read a banned book, walk your dog and I’ll see you next week.
1 Pun very much intended.
SOME GEEK TOLD ME 
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