This is a quick follow up from yesterday’s post. The Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, Boris Johnson (It’s been nearly 3 years, but I still have trouble with that statement), faced a no-confidence vote against his own Conservative Party, know as the Tories.

To remove Boris as leader and Prime Minister, over 180 Tory MPs needed to vote against him. I hate to break it to you, but the Tories failed. What a surprise.

211 Tory MPs voted for Boris, while 148 Tory MPs voted against him. The result is that he gets to stay at 10 Downing St; for at least the time being.

Even though Boris and the government have stated that this result has given them a victory, so they can continue to level up the UK, it’s just a victory on paper; it’s very thin.

59% of Tory MPs have supported Boris, but 41% don’t. To put it another way, 2 out of every 5 Tory MPs, do not support their own leader. That’s insane.

If this result is truly a victory for Boris, it’s a pyrrhic victory; like the Battle of the Alamo, the Battle of Bunker Hill, the Battle of Hoth, or recently, the Siege of Mariupol. You’ve won the battle, but just so you can lose the war.

This vote is actually the beginning of the end for Boris Johnson and the Tories. They may have survived this round, but the British public will not forget this; especially at the next election.

Thanks for reading Some Geek Told Me. It actually means a lot to me. Look afterwards yourselves, and I’ll see you next Monday.

Kia ora and welcome to the third part of my tiny blog, looking at the 10 Downing St shenanigans, covered in the Sue Gray report. Today is the final chapter in a trilogy that nobody asked for, because nobody realised how incompetent Boris Johnson’s government truly were.

Actually, I feel that’s a falsehood. I think millions of people realised that, before the report.

This final nugget of haughtiness is quite special, because it’s a 2-for-1 deal; or maybe it’s buy 1, get 1 free. Take your pick of egotism, narcissism, and irresponsible behaviour, from the Tories finest.

Part Three: Double Trouble

On 16th April 2021, 10 Downing St did not just have one gathering, but two! The United Kingdom had moved to Step 2, of lifting restrictions of the second national lockdown. There was still to be no indoor social gathering at people’s homes, but also social distancing needed to be maintained at the work place.

Here we go…

For the third time, I’ll let the report explain the situation:

Two leaving events took place on 16 April 2021. One, the event for James Slack
and the other, an event to mark the departure of a No 10 official. This latter event
was organised on the day, by email which sent at 16.26 by a No 10 official to the
No 10 Digital team, No 10 Press Office, Events & Visits and others.

There was no scheduled time for the event on the invitation. This email invitation included a Microsoft Teams link so that individuals could attend virtually and was called ‘[No 10 official] Leaving Presentation’. The location was the No 10 Digital Team office
which is situated in the basement of No 10.

The Digital team is part of the No 10 Press Office team and there was considerable
overlap in attendance at the two events. The first, for James Slack, began at
approximately 18.30, with speeches in the Press Office. He wished to thank his
team members individually and to set out future direction for the team. It lasted for
around an hour and there were approximately 45 people in total in attendance both
in the office and with a small number online.

Those present in person came from across No 10, including senior officials. Some joined the event virtually. Wine and beer had been bought by staff and was consumed by some during the speeches. Following the speeches, some staff returned to work but others continued chatting and drinking. They remained for some time and were present when the building 35 was being locked down for the evening. Those still present were asked to leave the building by a No 10 custodian.

The group then moved into the No 10 garden. The second event, for the other No 10 official, was held in the offices of the Digital Team in the basement of No 10. It began at approximately the same time as the event for the Director of Communications, at around 18.00, but was smaller in scale, with 15-20 people present, including a special adviser and more junior officials. There were leaving speeches and a presentation.

Wine was available and music was played from a laptop on top of a printer. A number of those present drank excessively. There was mingling between the two events, with some staff moving up and down the stairs in between the basement and the Press Office.

The two groups eventually joined together in the Downing Street garden. Shortly before 21.30, there were over 20 people present in the garden, with a number of bottles of
alcohol.

A number of individuals gathered near a child’s swing/slide in the garden,
damaging it by leaning on and playing with it. This was noticed the next morning
and reported to No 10 staff.

At this time, the custodian staff at No 10 continued to lock down the building. They
noted that groups of individuals had gone into the garden. The group began to
break up and return into the main building at around 21.30.

The No 10 entry logs show that a number of people left No 10 at this point. They
were encouraged by the custodian to use the rear exit of No 10. Some individuals
remained in the building and carried on drinking alcohol until the early hours. Exit
logs indicate that some left after midnight and others between 01.45-02.45. Two
members of staff stayed later still, with one leaving at 03.11 and the last leaving at
04:20.

Wow. Utter madness. Two leaving parties occurred on the same day at 10 Downing St, with alcohol and speeches, which left a child’s playground equipment damaged. My questions about these amateurish and botched social events are as follows:

• Did Jacob Rees-Mogg attend any of the gatherings? Was he emailed an invitation by accident?
• How bad were the speeches that alcohol was needed to help people survive them?
• Did any of the speeches mention that The Batman, was pushed back to October 2021? What were people’s thoughts about this?
• How many arses did the custodian(s) have to kick that night?
• How many £3 bottles of wine were consumed from the local off license?
• Who played DJ for the evening or was it a team effort?
• What was the most popular song of the evening? Was it The Gambler, by Kenny Rogers?
• When the two groups joined together, was it a turf war, like the Sharks and the Jets, in West Side Story?
• Has the person that damaged the swing/slide in the garden, ever been identified? Has Scotland Yard, MI5, James Bond, or Sherlock Holmes opened an investigation yet?
• Who were the two staff members that stayed until 3.11 am and 4.20 am? Was Tinder involved?

When thousands of children across the country were unable to attend birthday parties, or invite their friends to their own parties; because they were following the rules, the Tories threw two parties on the same night, at 10 Downing St!

I would say this would be disgraceful behaviour, but that’s an understatement about this shameful mess.

Boris Johnson and the Tories have only apologised to the public, because they were caught. They did not apologise straight after the events. Please remember that at the next general election.

Two things to close with:

1.) Thank you to the photographer(s) for taking the photos on 19th June 2020, and 13th November 2020, during those social events. The Tories look dishonest and hilarious at the same time. The photos are priceless and beautiful.

2.) Boris Johnson will be facing a no-confidence vote by Tory MPs, on 6th June, between 6 p.m. and 8 p.m. (UK time). To remove him as leader, over 180 Tory MPs have to vote against him. Here’s hoping those Tory MPs will sack him. We’ll have to wait for the result, but whatever happens, I’ll let you know, because, like I have nothing else to do.

Stay tuned for the result. Until then, thanks for reading, wash your hands, and I’ll see you soon.

PS: I couldn’t resist adding this. I’m very childish.

Welcome back to Part Two of the 10 Downing St shenanigans, as mentioned in the Sue Gray Report. If you’re not sure what you’re reading, don’t panic; it happens to me all the time. I really mean that.

Just read my previous blog about Part One, and hopefully you’ll be brought up to speed on Boris Johnson’s government, causing calamity, carnage and catastrophes, during the United Kingdom COVID-19 lockdowns and restictions.

So, let’s move onto the second part:

Part Two: Secret Santa

This 10 Downing St apocalyptic event, was held on the 18th December 2020, three days after the quiz event. Before we go on, please remember that the United Kingdom was still under a second national lockdown, which required people to stay at home, with no more than two people from other households for indoor gatherings, leading up to and around Christmas. Remember that.

Once again, I’ll let the report explain the situation:

The 18 December 2020 was a Friday, when the weekly Press Office meeting and
“Wine Time Friday” would have normally taken place. It was also the last working
Friday of 2020 and there was a desire to mark the occasion.

Some work did take place in the Press Office and No 10 whilst this event was
underway, in relation to the ongoing negotiations on a trade deal ahead of the UK’s
exit from the EU scheduled for 31 December 2020; and on the emergence of the
Delta variant of Covid 19, raising issues of what Covid restrictions would be
necessary over the Christmas period with announcements being made the next
day.

A number of senior members of the Press Office attended or observed
relevant meetings and discussed follow up action. The event started by about 18.00 which was later than scheduled. It took place in the same space as the leaving event on 27 November 2020, in the area just outside the No 10 Press Office.

A Secret Santa gift exchange took place. There was also a quiz.
An awards ceremony took place, at around 19.45. A No 10 official sent a message
to one of the WhatsApp groups at 19.49 stating “prize giving now guys, return”. The
investigation was informed that this was an extension of the type of awards
ceremony which might take place on “Wine Time Friday”.

Those present gathered together at the meeting table in the small area outside the main Press Office. Awards certificates were handed out to staff by Jack Doyle, a senior special
adviser. There were about 30 certificates prepared, although not all those awarded
certificates were present. The ceremony lasted between 10-25 minutes and
between 15 and 45 people were in the room during that time.

At approximately 19.45 that evening, a panic alarm button was accidentally
triggered by a member of staff. The custodians on duty responded, as did one of
the police officers on No 10 door duty. They observed a large number of people in
the area outside of the main Press Office and one individual giving a speech. Inside
the Press Office a further 15-20 people were present.

There was food and alcohol available which had been bought and brought in by
staff. Some members of staff drank excessively. The event was crowded and noisy such that some people working elsewhere in the No 10 building that evening heard
significant levels of noise coming from what they characterised as a “party” in the
Press Office. A cleaner who attended the room the next morning noted that there
had been red wine spilled on one wall and on a number of boxes of photocopier
paper.

The event lasted for several hours, with varying levels of attendance throughout,
including because officials left to attend official meetings. Attendance peaked
during the awards ceremony. No 10 exit logs show a number of members of staff
remaining in the office until after midnight.

So, to recap the sequence of absurd events: A party was held at 10 Downing St, with 15-45 people attending. Food and alcohol were served, along with playing another quiz, with Secret Santa presents and awards were given out.

Let’s also remember, that some person; drunk no doubt, set off the panic alarm button and red wine was spilled on the wall, and on some boxes. My questions about this idiotic debauchery are as follows:

• Did Jacob Rees-Mogg compete in the quiz? What was his score? (Same question as last time)
• Did Boris Johnson receive a Secret Santa gift? If so, what was it?
• Did Boris Johnson give a Secret Santa gift? Is it possible to return it to the discount bin at ASDA?
• Are “Wine Time Fridays” still going on at 10 Downing St?
• Has Nigel Farage ever turned up to whine about the EU and immigrants?
• Was anybody unhappy with their Secret Santa gift?
• Can we return Boris Johnson back to Henley?
• Has WhatsApp come out and said, “Don’t you dare drag us into this mess!”
• Did Jack Doyle have a good night? Did he give himself a certificate?
• What were the certificates for? ie Most affairs in the year, Highest number of sex scandals in a year, Lowest IQ (who could tell?), The highest number of laws broken in a year, The greatest amount of lies told to the British people in a single day.
• Who was the imbecile that set off the panic alarm? No really, who was it?
• Was the cleaner given a bonus, for cleaning up Tory left overs?

While the British public were saying their final goodbyes to their loved ones, via Zoom, the Tories were having a Friday night bender at 10 Downing St. Disgraceful does not even scratch the surface of this insult. They made the rules. They enforced the rules. They just didn’t follow them. I wonder if their parents or children are proud of them?

I’m actually doing this without swearing, so I think I’m doing alright. That’s all from me tonight, because my dog is asleep on my pillow again, so I need to set up the couch. I’ll see you on Monday for the third and final part of the Sue Gray report. Until then, thanks for reading, wash your hands and remember to breathe.