Author: somegeektoldme@gmail.com

My baby is now 5 years old

On By somegeektoldme@gmail.comIn Children, Parents

I want to talk about UMC2. Why? For the people that already know, please just humour me. For those that don’t know, I have two sons, and I refer to them on this blog as UMC1 and UMC2, which stands for Unmatured Clone 1, and Unmatured Clone 2. The running joke is that my wife and I only make clones of myself, hence UMC1 and UMC2.

Sweet? Awesome, I’ll continue. UMC2 recently turned 5 years old, and I feel a bit like Charybdis, but with feelings and hormones. He’s my baby boy, and now he’s five. So I’m left with a question: What does this mean? The short answer is that I don’t know. The long answer is a little more complicated, as you would expect.

Traditionally in New Zealand, a child would start primary school when they turned 5 years old, but legally they don’t need to start until 6 years old; or at least enrolled some where to receive a primary education, like home school. UMC2 is starting primary school in the 1st term of 2024, but that is a blog for another day.

Image by PX41-Media from Pixabay

The point that I’m badly trying to make, is that UMC2 is now old enough to go to school. I can’t speak for any other father; or at least another parent, but it’s a surreal notion to know that my baby boy is old enough to do that.

Both UMC1 and UMC2 make me feel old; especially UMC2, which isn’t that hard, to be honest. Growing up, my home phone number was just four digits long and $1’s worth of 1¢ lollies could send you into a sugar coma. Now days, I feel you need a second mortgage, just to go to the supermarket. We didn’t have multiple streaming services either, we had a VCR and two tv channels.

Anyway, Einstein was right; because of course he was, that time is relative. The last five years experienced by me, have gone extremely quickly. I remember the day UMC2 was born, because we had a home birth and the midwife suggested that I could catch him; though technically we didn’t know his gender during pregnancy. As my wife gave birth to him, I did my best wicketkeeper impression, and caught him with two hands. I was the first person to hold UMC2, which is a truth that will never leave me. Excuse me for a few moments, because my eyes are starting to leak.

Thanks for waiting. I better change the direction of the rant, before I start sobbing and gushing again. My mind wanders a lot, particularly about UMC2’s future. What will it look like? Where will he live? Will he have the opportunity to use a hoverboard, even though it’s currently 7 years behind schedule? Will he marry? Will I be at the wedding? Would I be invited to the wedding?

I can see UMC2 as a teenager explaining a new piece of technology to me, which to him is basic; but to me, I’ll need an university degree to understand it. New lexicon, fashion and pop culture will have to be explained to me, so I hope UMC2 will be patient with…Let’s be honest, that boy will have no patience for his old man. None.

UMC2 is similar to his older brother, but still very different. What works for UMC1, can and will not work for UMC2; but that’s ok. Whatever life lessons UMC1 taught me about being a parent, UMC2 is adding to them. Granted the lessons will be delivered with the washing basket on their head, along with a newly created ripped up cardboard collection, and a treasure box; which is a small yellow plastic box filled with broken items.

Ultimately, I don’t mourn the fact there are technically no preschoolers in my house now. There’s just a new level of shenanigans from two school aged children. Additionally, for recent UMC1 and UMC2 misadventures, there are blogs about my review of their restaurant, and creating a Lego family.

Have you ever had conflicting feelings, when your youngest child turned 5 years old? Please let me know.

Sorry if this blog was a bit odd, but I just needed to empty my mind of this topic, and fill it with things, like rugby and football scores, the politics of Count Binface, and designing the next fort to make in the lounge. Also the FIFA World Cup 2023 starts in under a month, with Australia and New Zealand co-hosting the tournament. Make sure you watch some games!

Thanks once again for reading, following, and subscribing to Some Geek Told Me. Remember to walk your dog; read a banned book; beware supermarket check out operators that actually talk to you, and I’ll see you next week.

Life lessons that music has taught me: Volume 1

On By somegeektoldme@gmail.comIn Music

I want to talk about life lessons. Why? Life lessons can sometimes be extremely easy to learn, understand and accept; like Salt and Vinegar chips being a superior flavour. That’s easy. However, there are some life lessons that are the opposite; they are difficult to understand or accept. They hurt. An example of this is eating Sour Cream and Chives. Your body will never forgive you.

You can learn life lessons from your family, friends, workmates, sports heroes, and even fictional characters, ranging from books to movies. But, what about music? From Nicki Minaj’s Anaconda, to Bill Haley & His Comets’ Rock Around the Clock, to Psy’s Gangnam Style, music can offer us a plethora of life lessons, disguised as pearls of wisdom, or just some bat-shit crazy advice.

Music can offer life lessons to all parts of our lives, from love, money, careers, health, children, injustice, sports, entertainment, sex, politics, and so much more.

Below are some of my favourite lessons or advice (but not all of them) that I’ve learnt from music, while I’ve been travelling around the Sun. Congratulations to anybody with enough time on their hands, that can name every song that’s on this list.

The life lessons are not arranged in any particular order; just as they have come to me. Well, except the last two, because they are rather obvious. At least to me, anyway. Also, I have tried extremely hard to limit one life lesson per artist or band, just to be fair. But since Some Geek Told Me is not a democracy, rules can sometimes be broken.

·         Image by Pexels from Pixabay
  • Don’t look back in anger.
  • Push the tempo.
  • Life isn’t easy for a boy named Sue.
  • Don’t be told what you want, don’t be told what you need.
  • You got to breath and have some fun.
  • Time is a piece of wax falling on a termite, that’s choking on the splinters.
  • Tell me the gospel according to you.
  • ‘Cause nothing’s the same when you wait for something.
  • The world is a vampire.
  • Go make yourself some friends, or you’ll be lonely.
  • ‘Cause your crystal ball ain’t so crystal clear.
  • Regrets collect like old friends.
  • You can take back your memories, they’re no good to me.
  • With your opinion, which is of no consequence at all.
  • So get out your seat and jump around.
  • Love, love is a verb. Love is a doing word.
  • You got it … what it takes. Go get it … where you want it?
  • Is that all you got?, I’ll take your best shot.
  • Everything’s happy underground.
  • ‘Cause there’s good deeds and there is good intention. They’re as far apart as heaven and hell.
  • What do you do when all your enemies are friends?
  • I don’t care what they say about us anyway, I don’t care about that.
  • Could everyone agree that no one should be left alone?
  • Closing time, every new beginning, comes from some other beginning’s end.
  • People crying for freedom, no one hears the sound.
  • Don’t let the days go by.
  • The death of one is a tragedy, the death of millions is just a statistic.
  • A change would do you good.
  • The cover is not the book.

My wife’s contribution to this list is: Life’s a bitch and then you die.

And now for the two rather obvious life lessons from music. This is the best gambling advice I’ve heard from music:

You got to know when to hold ’em, know when to fold ’em.
Know when to walk away and know when to run.
You never count your money when you’re sittin’ at the table.
There’ll be time enough for countin’ when the dealing’s done.

And this is one of the best life lessons about history, music has ever taught me:

We didn’t start the fire. It was always burning, since the world’s been turning. We didn’t start the fire. No, we didn’t light it, but we tried to fight it.

Do you agree with any of these life lessons from music, or maybe I left your favourite one out? Please let me know. Additionally I named this blog Volume 1, because I will write Volume 2 soon; there’s so much more to mention! Anyway, that’s it for another weekly rant. I’m making my way through Picard: Season 2, so I’ve got some serious Star Trekking to do.

Thanks once again for reading, following, and subscribing to Some Geek Told Me. Remember to walk your dog; read a banned book; stay away from the Dune Sea, and I’ll see you next week.

My wife’s thoughts on the Coronation of King Charles III

On By somegeektoldme@gmail.comIn History, People, Television

I want to talk about the Coronation of King Charles III. Why? There are two main reasons for this, and I think you can guess the second reason. Let’s back up and start with the first reason. The last British coronation was on 2nd June 1953, when Queen Elizabeth II was crowned, after the death of her father, George VI.

Being a New Zealander and a student of history, watching the coronation of Elizabeth’s son, Charles III, was always a possibility. I mean, coronations don’t happen every week, do they? Maybe in Game of Thrones, but not in real life. The concept of the coronation was fascinating because, like billions of other people, I had never seen a live British coronation.

Image by Sir Jony Ive

Because of the time zone difference, the coronation would be screened live in New Zealand, on Saturday night. Now the thing about last Saturday night, there was no test rugby on; so I could watch the coronation. However would I though? This would require some things to happen: UMC1 and UMC2 would need to be asleep before the coverage began, but I’d also need my wife’s blessing.

You see we have made Saturday night our date night. And when I mean date night, I mean staying at home to either play board games, play a PC Lego game, or watch a movie or tv series. You know, the standard thing that extremely cool people do on a Saturday night.

So I was unsure whether I wanted to watch the coronation. Watching a historic event, or helping Lego Harry Potter to survive Years 5-6? Oh, the agony of making a geek choose. The interesting point is that the decision was actually taken away from me, because my wife suggested we watch the coronation together.

I was stunned at this because my wife is; and I’m quoting her description of herself as, “…a no-frills practical person.” A coronation was one of the last things, I would imagine my wife actually sitting down to watch, but she did it to spend time with her awkward geeky husband, so she scored some great spouse points.

Let’s set the scene, shall we? We’re in the bedroom watching the coverage via the laptop, with my wife sitting on the bed, and I’m in the swivel chair. After playing several games of Uno and waiting for the coronation procession to begin, my wife started her master plan. She knew I’d be listening and watching carefully to the coverage, so she started trying to be funny to annoy me, just because she could. Among many other statements during the coronation’s coverage, my wife set these zingers off:

If this is the scaled back version, I would hate to see what the full on version looks like.

If they were already in the car, why bother with the horses and carriage?

Is that a moat or a wet footpath?

What the hell?! Is that Richie McCaw?!

When the announcer introduced Liz Truss, as being the UK Prime Minister for a brief time, my wife and I both said, “What a burn!”

How many more people are they going to cram in?!

What’s with the Michael Jackson glove?

They would all be screwed if the cue card guy dropped the cards!

Elsa’s coronation wasn’t this bloody long.

A good excuse to wear robes, I guess.

When eating some cheese and crackers, she turned to me and said, “Wilt thou partaketh of these snacks?”

Where are they going? Out the back to sit down? They sat the whole way there and most of the service.

When the coronation procession ended at Buckingham Palace, that was the signal for us to go to sleep. Before we did though, my wife asked if I liked her commentary, because she said that she awesome. It is true, she is awesome; sometimes.

What did you think about the coronation? Was my wife correct? Please let me know. And with that, another weekly rant has ended; though we did have Star Wars Day and Free Comic Book Day.

Thanks once again for reading, following, and subscribing to Some Geek Told Me. Remember to walk your dog; read a banned book; eat French Vanilla ice cream; and I’ll hopefully see you next week.

Happy Free Comic Book Day 2023!

On By somegeektoldme@gmail.comIn Comics1 Comment

Welcome to the second special geek blog for the week! It’s Free Comic Book Day aka FCBD!

Some major things are happening today. Thousands of retailers around the world will open their doors and celebrate comics’ biggest day of the year. They will be giving away free comics across three age ratings: All ages (green logo), Teen (blue logo), and Mature (red logo), which can be identified on the covers.

These comics cover nearly every possible genre you can think of, so there’s something for everybody. I’ll like to point out, that even though the FCBD comics are purposely created for the day, and are given away for free to the public; actually cost the retailer, something like 25 cents per issue. It actually costs them a lot of money to host the event.

Full line up of FCBD Comics

A cool thing about FCBD is cosplaying. Many stores have cosplay competitions to celebrate the day, but others just encourage people to dress up, because they want to. I live 200 km from a comic book store, so I won’t be cosplaying; but if I did, I would cosplay as a tired father, wearing a t-shirt featuring science jokes, and carrying a wallet where my money used to be.

Another place that could be celebrating FCBD, could be your local library. A lot of them will be promoting the graphic novels in their collection, as well as holding cosplay events.

Image by Tania Van den Berghen from Pixabay

If you’re thinking of attending FCBD, so please do it and support your local comic book store. I’ve said this before, but they are the life blood of the industry, so while you’re receiving free comic books, maybe you could have a thorough look around the store. You could find something you didn’t know you needed!

How are you celebrating FCBD? Please let me know. Ok, that’s it for me. Enjoy FCBD and I’ll see you on Monday.

Happy Star Wars Day 2023!

On By somegeektoldme@gmail.comIn Books, Comics, Movies, Television1 Comment

It’s time to celebrate one of the most important days on the Geek calendar. Today is the 4th May; Star Wars Day! Now to say Star Wars Day isn’t a big deal to our family, is a massive understatement. The love for Star Wars in strong in my family. I have it, my wife has it, and our children have it.

From movies, books, comics, toys, board games, cosplay, and tv shows, we love Star Wars. I mean I did get married on Star Wars Day, as well as give UMC2, a Star Wars name. That is next level commitment.

Image by tookapic from Pixabay

Because of this special day, I’d like to share two of our favourite Star Wars books. First is UMC2’s pride and joy; Star Wars: The Secret Life of Droids. He loves this book, and quite often retells information about IG-88, Pit droids, Crab droids, Probe droids, and every other droid, to some unfortunate people at the supermarket.

The second book is Star Wars: Alien Archive. This was given to me as a birthday gift, which contains information and illustrations about the various alien species in the Star Wars universe. I’m not ashamed to admit it, but this book has been quite helpful with reading other Star Wars content. Nice.

And to end this short and zealous blog, I’d like to talk about Power droids, aka Gonk droids. All four of us love Power droids. I mean, who wouldn’t? Anyway, some very creative people, produced a fan film about everybody’s favourite walking battery; it’s awesome. If Disney actually made a real movie or tv show about Power droids, we would all watch it.

Do you celebrate Star Wars Day? Please let me know what you do. That’s it for this special blog, and I’ll see you on Saturday for the second special geek blog. May the Force be with you. Always.

Tour of the Solar System: Mercury

On By somegeektoldme@gmail.comIn Science

Yes that’s right, it’s that time of the month for everybody’s least favourite astronomy blog: My Tour of the Solar System. This is the fourth amazing entry of the tour, so if you’re new, or you don’t know what to do, I promise it’s ok. The three previous entries are: Meet the Family, The Sun, and Planets vs. Dwarf planets.

When we last left the tour, I was waffling on about the differences between planets and dwarf planets, because you know, dwarf planets are a real thing. Seriously. So because of this, we move onto the first planet from the Sun, Mercury.

Mercury. Image by WikiImages from Pixabay

Named after the messenger of the gods in Roman mythology, Mercury is quite odd, considering a few of its siblings are overachievers. Mercury is believed to be 4.5 billion years old, so its quite similar to Earth in age.

Mercury is the smallest planet in our Solar System, with a mean diameter of 4,880 km; which puts it slightly larger than the Moon, at 3,474 km. Basically, if there was an arm wrestle between the two of them, your money should go on Mercury; but keep your cryptocurrency on Earth, because no other planet wants it.

Even though Mercury is the closest planet to the Sun, it is not the hottest; but it’s still worth swiping right. Mercury orbits the Sun at a range of 47 million km (29 million miles) to 70 million km (43 million miles); with an average distance of 58 million km (36 million miles). To put this into perspective, Earth orbits the Sun at an average distance of 150 million km (93 million miles).

Given its proximity to the Sun, Mercury is a hot mess. The length of time it takes for light to travel from the Sun to Mercury, is 192 light seconds or 3.2 light minutes, which is less time to boil an egg.

Temperatures can vary as much as Cookie Monster can eat all of the cookies in a single day. The surface temperatures on Mercury are insanely hot and cold. Day temperatures can reach 430°C (800°F), while night temperatures can plummet to -180°C (-290°F). Because it has no atmosphere, Mercury can’t hold onto the heat during the night, resulting in cold temperatures. Can you imagine the electricity bills?

And like the Flash, Mercury lives up to its namesake. Compared to all of the planets in the Solar System, Mercury is the fastest; even Usain Bolt would be moving like a statue in comparison. Not a Weeping Angel, though. To hell with that.

The further away a planet is from the Sun, the slower it travels; however the opposite is also true. Because Mercury is the closest planet to the Sun, it has the shortest distance to travel around it. This has resulted with Mercury travelling through space at 47 km (29 miles) per second, but it also has some counterintuitive discoveries.

  • Mercury spins slowly on its axis, at a rate of once every 59 Earth days.
  • It takes 88 Earth days for Mercury to orbit the Sun; which equals one Mercury year.
  • It takes 176 Earth days for Mercury to complete one solar Mercury day. Mercury has an elliptical orbit, which means twice during its orbit, it gets quite close to the Sun and speeds up, so it appears the Sun would be going backward; if you were standing on Mercury’s surface.
  • This means one day on Mercury, is longer than a Mercury year.

And just to add some more fun stuff; Mercury has no rings, no natural satellites (moons), plus it is tidally locked with the Sun.

Just like Red, Boober, Mokey, Gobo, and Wembley are all Fraggles; Venus, Earth, Mars, and Mercury are all rocky or terrestrial planets. Mercury looks like our Moon, with craters covering the surface, however with the crust and mantle being made of rock, the core is solid iron. This works out to be 75% of Mercury’s diameter. Because of Mercury’s smaller size, when the core cooled down, it become solid, which made Mercury shrink and caused the surface to wrinkle. This didn’t happen to Earth because it was larger, along with the fact our outer core was liquid, and the inner core was solid.

The majority of the craters on Mercury are actually named after famous artists, composers, and writers. The most famous crater is Caloris Planitia, which is an impact basin, stretching 1,550 km (960 miles) in diameter. For perspective, the length of the United Kingdom is about 1,000 km (600 miles). The Caloris Planitia is surrounded by a ring of mountains; and no, they are not the Ash Mountains, nor the Mountains of Shadow; but rather the Caloris Montes, which are 1-3 km high.

Another reason to swipe right, is the fact that Mercury’s mass is less than 6% of Earth’s. This means Mercury’s gravity is weaker, so if you weighed 70 kg on Earth, you would only weigh 26.6 kg on Mercury. Imagine how high you could jump?

Do you remember what I said about Mercury not having an atmosphere? Good job, you were paying attention. Well, Mercury does have a thin exosphere though. This exosphere is mostly made of oxygen, sodium, hydrogen, helium, and potassium. If you could stand on the surface of Mercury without a protective space suit, the cold, heat or just lack of air, would kill you in under 90 seconds. That’s something to put on the tourism brochure!

All and all, Mercury is a special and unique world, but just like visiting the dentist, you really wouldn’t like to go there. And with that, it’s time to wrap up another tour stop of the Solar System. Yah! This coming week, I’m going to be releasing two special short blogs, celebrating two important days on the Geek calendar. Do you know what they are? The first one will be on Thursday, while the second will be on Saturday. Three blogs in a week? I’ll need a lie down to do this.

Thanks once again for reading, following, and subscribing to Some Geek Told Me. Remember to walk your dog; read a banned book; stop running with scissors; and I’ll see you next week.

Does everybody celebrate World Book Day?

On By somegeektoldme@gmail.comIn Books, Children, People

I want to talk about books. Why? Today in New Zealand, we have been celebrating World Book Day; well at least some of us have. This is a global event to promote and encourage reading, publishing, and books in general.

It’s a great day for a bibliophile. We get to discuss our favourite books, as well as to emphasise the importance of reading. 

Now I could do something predictable and list my favourite books through different genres; like the dictionary. I bet you can’t wait for that one!

I could also discuss what reading means to me and the importance of it, but that’s too easy. As tempting as it is to choose one of these amazing options; it would be like being involved in a movie marathon, where you have to choose between the original Star Wars trilogy and the Lord of the Rings trilogy. What is a geek supposed to do?

But before I could do any of that, I have to put my hand up and acknowledge something. I am a straight white male, living in a country that is 21st in the world for GDP per Capita, and 15th in the Human Developmental Index.

I understand that if I was born in a different country, or at a different time, it is entirely possible that books would be an unknown or rare commodity to me, or at least learning how to read would be an ability that would not be available to me.

So in fairness, and as much as I like World Book Day and believe in its importance and relevancy, I have to ask the question: Does everybody in the world celebrate World Book Day? Realistically, the answer is no. 

Image by Ahmad Ardity from Pixabay

Sometimes I feel people take reading for granted because they have access to books; whether through school or public libraries, and bookstores. You can purchase any book from anywhere in the world and have it delivered to you, though the cost of postage could be the same as the national debt of a small country. 

The issue is that a lot of people in the world don’t have access to books, or they can’t read. Over the years, world literacy rates have been rising. To the best of my knowledge, which quite frankly isn’t that great, New Zealand sits at 99%, which is pretty good. There are even higher literacy rates in Western Europe and Central Asia, which hit 100%, which to me is phenomenal.

So just like with nearly everything, if you have Salt and Vinegar chips, the opposite will exist. I don’t really need to remind you about Sour Cream and Chives, do I?

There are at least 10 countries in the world, where the literacy rate for the population is under 44%. The bottom three are South Sudan 34.52%, Guinea 32% and Chad 22.31%.

There is a staggering 781 million people that cannot read or write in the world, with over 60% of them being female. Different factors that can contribute to this problem are poverty, religion, but also the geopolitical climate of the country.

So you’re probably thinking, “Ok Scott, do you even have a point?”

For me, the concept that somewhere in this world, a child will not have access to picture books in their native language, is difficult to understand and accept. But maybe that’s the point. Maybe we don’t have to accept it. I don’t know how to solve this problem, but you have to start somewhere, right?

I’ve been thinking about this, and I’ve come to two conclusions about what we can do about it. 

To address literacy rates, whether at local, national, or international levels, I think it comes down to two things; which are essentially the same thing: we have to give. We have to give either books or money. 

I know I’m not an expert, but I think everybody can help:

  • Cull some novels from your collection and donate to charities. 
  • Cull some picture books from your collection, and donate them to some early childhood centres.
  • If you buy a book, donate a book.
  • Become a member of your local library and enrol your children. 
  • If possible, volunteer in your local community with a organisation that promotes literacy.
  • Donate money to a group or organisation that promotes literacy.

There are many different international groups and organisations that specialse in promoting literacy. These can include:

There are also many more hardworking groups and organisations around the world, that are helping to promote literacy; whether with adults or children. Please help pass on your love of reading to someone else.

“What an astonishing thing a book is. It’s a flat object made from a tree with flexible parts on which are imprinted lots of funny dark squiggles. But one glance at it and you’re inside the mind of another person, maybe somebody dead for thousands of years. 

Across the millennia, an author is speaking clearly and silently inside your head, directly to you. Writing is perhaps the greatest of human inventions, binding together people who never knew each other, citizens of distant epochs. 

Books break the shackles of time. A book is proof that humans are capable of working magic.”

-Carl Sagan.

And with that, I’m done with another ridiculous blog. Thanks once again for reading, following, and subscribing to Some Geek Told Me. Remember to walk your dog; read a banned book; stay away from yellow snow; and I’ll see you next week.

Alternative Disney Princesses

On By somegeektoldme@gmail.comIn Movies

I want to talk about Disney Princesses. Why? The concept of a Disney Princess is an interesting one to me; I mean, what is a Disney Princess? And do I have a favourite?

To answer the second question first, I don’t have a favourite princess, because why would I? Having said that, the geek in me thinks Belle is ok. The reason being, that she reads for pleasure. She’s just like my wife, if Belle read Twilight, Fifty Shades of Grey, The Hunger Games, Harry Potter, The All Souls Trilogy, or The Witcher.

To the best of my understanding, there are 12 official Disney Princesses, with one being confirmed, but not officially added. They are:

1.) Snow White (Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs: 1937)

2.) Cinderella (Cinderella: 1950)

3.) Aurora (Sleeping Beauty: 1959)

4.) Ariel (The Little Mermaid: 1989)

5.) Belle (Beauty and the Beast: 1991)

6.) Jasmine (Aladdin: 1992)

7.) Pocahontas (Pocahontas: 1995)

8.) Mulan (Mulan: 1998)

9.) Tiana (The Princess and the Frog: 2009)

10.) Rapunzel (Tangled: 2010)

11.) Merida (Brave: 2012)

12.) Moana (Moana: 2016)

and to be added:

13.) Raya (Raya and the Last Dragon: 2021)

So let’s answer the most pressing question, what is a Disney Princess?

That’s a difficult question, because the answer is vague; again, to the best of my understanding. I’m not a Disney Princess expert, because if I was, I would have made a job out it.

  • A Disney Princess is the main female protagonist in an animated Disney/Pixar film.
  • She can not be introduced in a sequel.
  • A Disney Princess does not always have to be royalty; she has just to perform some heroic and brave deeds.
  • Being a great singer or having an animal sidekick, are also not prerequisites to be a Disney Princess; but it does help.

Also Elsa and Anna from Frozen, are not Disney Princesses. This is because of the crazy concept, that they are too popular being the faces of the Frozen franchise. The Disney Princesses label brings in billions of dollars for the company, through different degrees of merchandise; it’s a global brand.

It’s about this time that you’ve thinking, “Ok Scott, thanks for the history lesson, but what’s your point?”

Image by Washington S. Seguro Ton from Pixabay

Relax young grasshopper, this is my point. Over the years, Disney has purchased many different companies, across multimedia enterprises. Some of their many acquisitions include:

  • Saban Entertainment
  • The Jim Henson Company
  • Pixar
  • Marvel Entertainment (Marvel)
  • Lucasfilm (Star Wars)
  • 21st Century Fox
  • Hulu

Because Disney has purchased these companies, their catalogues of characters now belong to Disney. You can probably see where I’m going with this.

Given the range of these female characters, Disney could have a completely new group of Disney Princesses, aimed for everybody; not just young girls. And all they have to do is follow this criteria:

  • A Disney Princess could be any female character, that is the main or supporting protagonist in a movie or tv show, that is made by or owned by Disney.
  • The medium can be live action or animated.
  • An antagonist can qualify, if they go on a redemptive arc.
  • Members of the LGBTIQA+ and remakes of movies/ tv shows count.
  • Her martial status, as well as whether she was born in royalty is irrelevant; she just has to be heroic.

There are hundreds of possible new princesses to choose from, but I can’t list them all. Seriously, I just can’t. And with that, may I present the list of the best Alternative Disney Princesses, or ADP.

Honorary Alternative Disney Princesses

  • Miss Piggy (The Muppets)
  • Camilla the Chicken (The Muppets)
  • Zoe (Sesame Street)
  • Julia (Sesame Street)
  • Abby Cadabby (Sesame Street)
  • Bo Peep (Toy Story)
  • Shuri (Black Panther)
  • Jessie (Toy Story)
  • Dory (Finding Nemo)
  • Michelle “MJ” Jones-Watson (Spider-Man)
  • Helen Parr (The Incredibles)
  • Violet Parr (The Incredibles)
  • Sadness (Inside Out)
  • Joy (Inside Out)
  • Disgust (Inside Out)
  • Maria Hill (The Avengers)
  • Kamala Khan (Ms. Marvel)
  • Xu Xialing (Shang-Chi)
  • Carol Danvers (Captain Marvel)
  • Wanda Maximoff (The Scarlet Witch)
  • Buttercup (The Princess Bride)
  • Meilin “Mei” Lee (Turning Red)
  • Hope van Dyne (The Wasp)
  • Mantis ((Guardians of the Galaxy)
  • Anastasia “Anya” Romanov (Anastasia)
  • Nakia (Black Panther)
  • Valkyrie (Thor)
  • Yelena Belova (Black Widow)
  • Hera Syndulla (Star Wars: Rebels)
  • Sabine Wren (Star Wars: Rebels)
  • Naru (Prey)

Arse Kicking Alternative Disney Princesses

  • Leia Organa Solo (Star Wars)
  • Asajj Ventress (Star Wars: The Clone Wars)
  • Jean Grey (X-Men)
  • Negasonic Teenage Warhead (X-Men)
  • Gamora (Guardians of the Galaxy)
  • Lisa Simpson (The Simpsons)
  • Peggy Carter (Captain America)
  • Ahsoka Tano (Star Wars: The Clone Wars)
  • Natasha Romanoff (Black Widow)
  • Mystique (X-Men)
  • Psylocke (X-Men)
  • Kitty Pryde (X-Men)
  • Nebula (Guardians of the Galaxy)
  • Okoye (Black Panther)
  • Rogue (X-Men)
  • Storm (X-Men)
  • Buffy Summers (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)
  • Edna Mode (The Incredibles)
  • Dana Scully (The X-Files)

The Ultimate Alternative Disney Princess

  • Ellen Ripley (Aliens). Basically if Ripley does not become a Disney Princess, then nobody serves that title.

Can you imagine the merchandise for these new Disney Princesses? Naru t-shirts, Sadness socks, Okoye jackets, Camilla the Chicken action figures, and Ripley backpacks? The options are endless.

Do you agree with this list? Did I leave anybody off? Who would be your favourite Alternative Disney Princess? Please let me know.

And that signals the end of another aimless rant into pop culture’s armpit. Thanks once again for reading, following and subscribing to Some Geek Told Me. Remember to walk your dog; watch a banned movie; stay away from John Wick’s dog; and I’ll see you next week.

Happy Two Year Anniversary Being on Twitter

On By somegeektoldme@gmail.comIn Social Media

I want to talk about Twitter. Why? As the title of the blog suggests, I have now been officially on Twitter for two years. I wrote about my first anniversary and with the publication of this blog, I would have made 1,214 tweets; and if I’m lucky, a few of them might be funny. Maybe.

A lot of things have happened over the past year. The Russia government on their Anti-Nazi crusade, invaded Ukraine, just like the Nazis did; inflation and CO2 levels are increasing, while crypto and my running speed are decreasing; Brexit is still failing; Ireland are the number one men’s rugby team in the world; and a photo of Sagittarius A*, the supermassive black hole at the centre of our Milky Way, was released.

This has left me with two questions: Within the past year, have I become a person of influence on Twitter? Let’s see, I don’t really discuss clothes, or food, or hairstyles. I listen to CDs, read manga, and have two children; which means money is what I used to keep in my wallet. Also my reading pile reproduces asexually, because it keeps multiplying. They just sit in my room taunting me, the bastards.

So, am I an influencer? Well, I’m not cool enough for YouTube, Tik Tok or Instagram; however I would love to influence people to buy books and socks. You can never have enough of either.

Oh, I forgot to clear the question up; the answer is no.

Image by Mizter_X94 from Pixabay

However, the second question concerns whether Twitter has taught this pizza loving, aging introvert anything over the past year? Let me count the ways.

1.) Having a new overlord in Elon Musk is interesting, if not entertaining.

2.) Twitter is still an echo chamber; but so is nearly everything else.

3.) It’s still fascinating looking at people’s responses, over the same piece of news.

4.) My skill at scheduling tweets is amazing!

5.) There are some extremely creative and talented people on this platform.

6.) I’m sitting on 13 followers, which means on average, I gain a new follower around every 93 tweets. Solid performance.

7.) I still laugh at some particular memes, which I then show my wife; whom explains that they’re not funny. She’ll then go to Facebook to show me funnier memes.

8.) It’s still mindboggling to me about the very small things on Twitter that can majorly offend people; however the stuff that needs people to be outraged on this platform, hardly gets a mention.

9.) I’m a big kid, because I love watching footage from the ISS, flying over countries; especially my own.

This of course takes us to something new I want to try. I don’t follow that many accounts on Twitter; mainly because I’m not cool enough to know what person or thing is hot to follow. However, I thought I would highlight a few of the accounts I do actually follow. The reason being; as I said before, there are some extremely creative people on this platform, and I want to throw some attention their way; not that they need any help from me.

For comedy, I would suggest five icons I follow:

Jonathan Pie@JonathanPieNews

Count Binface@CountBinface

John Green@johngreen

James O’Brien@mrjamesob

Trevor Noah@Trevornoah

These five are hilarious, but also very truthful in their own unique way.

For educational content, I’m being pedantic by grouping them into two different camps: education and science communication.

For education, you should visit:

CrashCourse@TheCrashCourse

SciShow@SciShow

Epic Maps@Locati0ns

Kurzgesagt@Kurz_Gesagt

These accounts provide top quality resources and information, and they are phenomenal.

For science communication, you need to stop and say hello to:

Neil deGrasse Tyson@neiltyson

Richard Dawkins@RichardDawkins

Derek Muller@veritasium

Brian Cox@ProfBrianCox

Hank Green@hankgreen

Henry Reich@minutephysics

Bill Nye@BillNye

I love science, so anytime any of these creators explain or present some information, I’m on it like Worf on prune juice.

And for the second to last entry, you really should check out, Massimo@Rainmaker1973. The sheer amount of tweets on this account are extraordinary, because of the high quality of the videos and information. I don’t understand how or where they get their information, but it’s amazing!

For the last entry, it sort of combines all of them:

Last Week Tonight@LastWeekTonight

For the time being, I’ll still be on Twitter for no other reason than if I quit, then I’ll have more free time. No more researching, writing and scheduling tweets for me! But that would mean I’ll have to do more jobs around the house, like fixing things, which I suck at. So, I’ll remain here posting boring tweets every day at 7am and 7pm UTC +12, and if I’m organised, maybe something else at a different time.

Thanks once again for reading, following and subscribing to Some Geek Told Me; it means a lot. Remember to walk your dog; watch a banned movie; stay away from Scorpio girls; and I’ll see you next week.

Things that Donald Trump has taught me

On By somegeektoldme@gmail.comIn People, Politics2 Comments

I want to talk about Donald Trump. Why? Where do I begin? I honestly can’t remember when or how I first heard of Donald Trump. Maybe it was at primary school, intermediate or high school, but that piece of information has been lost to the sands of time, like someone’s PIN code.

I’m not going to sit in my cold and dark little room, and give a brief introduction of Trump. I mean, why would I?! If you haven’t heard of the 45th President of the United States of America, then I’m quite envious of you.

I’ve been thinking of writing a blog about Trump for a long time now. Not as long as Kenneth Branagh’s Hamlet, because nothing is longer than that, but still a long time. However after his indictment last week, I thought now’s a good time to bust a blog out.

Image by Tibor Janosi Mozes from Pixabay

Over the years, many people with more literary talent and qualifications than myself, have written countless articles, reports, lawsuits and books about Trump. Because of this, I have some easy options open to me over what to write about.

  • Trump’s lawsuits.
  • Trump’s childhood.
  • Trump’s allies and friends.
  • Trump’s marriages.
  • Trump’s businesses.
  • Trump’s political career.
  • Trump’s tv and film performances.
  • Trump’s social media.
  • Trump’s two impeachments.
  • Trump’s indictment.

Even with these easy topics to discuss, here’s my Mum’s description of me to explain what I’m doing to do.

“If there’s an easy way and a complicated way of doing something, he will chose the complicated way, every single time.”

Sorry about that, Mum.

If you’re a sharp and clever person; like I know you must be, because you’re reading this blog, you would have noticed the title: Things that Donald Trump has taught me. I’m not talking about being a contestant on The Apprentice or having worked with him; no, I’m talking about living over 14,000 km away, while watching and reading about him. This concerns learning about people and life lessons; that I’ve learnt either directly or indirectly from Trump, that I will pass onto UMC1 and UMC2.

I’ve listed them in no particular order, however I did fight the urge to list them alphabetically or chronologically.

And with that, let’s do it.

People

News:

Thanks to Trump, I now know the names and faces of many reporters, anchors, talk show hosts, and journalists, across the media spectrum. I didn’t know these people existed before Trump, but I do now. This includes:

  • Fox News: Tucker Carlson, Laura Ingraham, Sean Hannity, Steve Doocy, Ainsley Earhardt, Brian Kilmeade, Kayleigh McEnany, Greg Gutfeld, Jesse Watters, Bret Baier, Jeanine Pirro, and Peter Doocy.
  • CNN: Don Lemon, Jim Acosta, John Berman, Victor Blackwell, Erin Burnett, Kate Bolduan, Alisyn Camerota, S. E. Cupp, Van Jones, and Abby Phillip.
  • MSNBC: Joe Scarborough, Mika Brzezinski, Willie Geist, Katy Tur, Nicolle Wallace, Chris Hayes, Ari Melber, Joy Reid, Hallie Jackson, Lawrence O’Donnell, and Stephanie Ruhle.
  • Talk Show Hosts: Bill Maher, Trevor Noah, Seth Meyers, Wendy Williams, Chelsea Handler, and Samantha Bee. And I can’t forget, Sean Spicer, Robin Roberts and George Stephanopoulos.

Politics:

Once again, I have to thank Trump, because now I know the names and faces of many politicians across the political spectrum. Again, I didn’t know these people existed before Trump, but I do now. This includes:

Republicans: Paul Ryan, Mike Pence, John Bolton, Devin Nunes, Ted Cruz, Marco Rubio, Ben Carson, Chris Christie, Rand Paul, Rick Perry, Lindsey Graham, Mike Lee, Chuck Grassley, John Barrasso, Tom Cotton, Rick Scott, Adam Kinzinger, Ron DeSantis, Susan Collins, Josh Hawley, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, Nikki Haley, J.D. Vance, Tim Scott, Ron Johnson, Marsha Blackburn, John Cornyn, Kay Ivey, Brian Kemp, Mike DeWine, Kristi Noem, Brad Raffensperger, Greg Abbott, Liz Cheney, Kevin McCarthy, Ryan Zinke, Paul Gosar, Lauren Boebert, Matt Gaetz, George Santos, Jim Jordan, Ronny Jackson, and of course, Marjorie Taylor Greene.

Democrats: Kamala Harris, Richard Blumenthal, Chris Murphy, Chris Coons, Jon Ossoff, Raphael Warnock, Dick Durbin, Tammy Duckworth, Elizabeth Warren, Amy Klobuchar, Cory Booker, Chuck Schumer, Kirsten Gillibrand, John Fetterman, Tim Kaine, Joe Manchin, Nancy Pelosi, Eric Swalwell, Stacey Abrams, Ilhan Omar, Hakeem Jeffries, Jerry Nadler, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, and Pete Buttigieg.

This also covers Bernie Sanders, Kyrsten Sinema and Angus King.

Others: Allen Weisselberg, Melania Trump, Tiffany Trump, Barron Trump, Kimberly Guilfoyle, Lara Trump, E. Jean Carroll, Samantha Holvey, Billy Bush, Jeffrey Epstein, Michael Cohen, Michael Avenatti, Herschel Walker, Joe Tacopina, Sidney Powell, Mike Lindell, Michael Flynn, George Papadopoulos, Roger Stone, Paul Manafort, Robert Mueller, Volodymyr Zelenskyy, William Barr, Jeff Sessions, Alvin Bragg, Fani Willis, and lastly, Stormy Daniels.

Every single one of these people, I know now because of Trump. I’m sorry if I’ve missed anybody out, but Trump’s been busy.

Life Lessons

  • Don’t open an university and name it after yourself.
  • A 76 year old male will never change, but its not too late for you to change.
  • Make sure you understand what the words “gaslighting” and “nepotism” mean.
  • During an eclipse, only look directly at the Sun with the correct eye protection.
  • Muslims are real people; but they are not coming to get you.
  • It’s possible to get a job that you’re not qualified to do.
  • Detonating a nuclear weapon inside a hurricane, is not a good idea.
  • Never name a brand of steaks after yourself.
  • You should never inject yourself with bleach.
  • You can only give someone a nickname, if you’re prepared to receive one; or if you’re 8 years old.
  • Even though you can hate it, it’s important to pay your taxes.
  • Always proof read and edit your social media posts.
  • It’s legal to make hush money payments in the State of New York, but it’s illegal to cover it up.
  • Members of the LGBTQ+ community are real people; but they are not coming to get you.
  • It’s not a great look if you’re on a social media rant, at 4.30 am when you’re the President of the United States of America.
  • If people quote or record what you’ve said, you can’t deny it happened when there is physical evidence.
  • Claiming you’ve never met a particular person, before photos being released of you meeting said person, is quite hilarious.
  • Take the time to learn about your country’s history; especially if there was a Civil War and the causes behind it.
  • If a Neo-Nazi or the Ku Klux Klan agrees with your views of society, you’re doing something wrong.
  • Reading is fun.
  • If someone is writing a book about you with your consent, and they’re following you around, please remember they are actually there.
  • Don’t call your favourite media talk show, to decry the media.
  • It’s important to learn world geography.
  • Vaccines are some of greatest achievements in the history of humanity.
  • Just because someone disagrees with you, doesn’t make them wrong or evil.
  • If you’re going to create a new word like bigly or covfefe, you can’t just use it once; you need to use it multiple times for it to catch on.
  • A Sharpie is a quality marker.
  • Children being killed at school through gun violence, should never be acceptable.
  • Understanding how the impeachment of a president works. (Twice).
  • Never conduct interviews, with a helicopter in the background.
  • Just because you don’t like what someone else says, doesn’t make it fake news.

I could go on, but UMC1 and UMC2 would have fallen asleep by now. But seriously, the biggest life lesson Trump has taught me, is this: Never lie about something, that can be fact checked by a person using their phone, during their toilet break.

Has Trump taught you anything? Please let me know. Anyway, I’m done with Trump tonight, but not forever. I need to sleep, because Daylight Savings has finished, and my body is rebelling against it. Thanks once again for reading, following and subscribing to Some Geek Told Me; it means a lot. Remember to walk your dog; watch a banned movie; stay away from variant comic book covers; and I’ll see you next week.